Your Views on Love & Hate

[Aberinkula]

[COLOR="77656"][B]Ths thread isn't an excuse to start flaming anyone. I don't want to see any flmaing. I may not be a mod, but this thread isn't about calling people names, or saying you hate any member on here. This thread is just about your views on the good and the bad. Just thought I'd take the precaution to make sure this doens't turn into a battle.[/B]

Ahem, now to the subject at hand. What do you think about love? Is it a beautiful process, or is it just an illusion of happiness? And what do you thik aout the oposite of love, hate? Is it a useless emotion and a malicious feeling to hold?

As for me, I'm currently in love. But I used to think it was a dumb feeling; for two reasons. A) Your heart ca be broken easily, and B) because it can drive you to do weird and sometimes horrible things, like suicide for example. Now fo rme it's not te case, for I have a beautiful relationship wiht my girfriend, who I wouldn't trade for the world.

[quote name='Kam']Hate produces things more evil than war. It produces things like murder, rape, torture, and the like. That said, hate is a very inappropriate word to describe feelings about someone you have no right to judge in the first place. And to use it in this fashion ultimately makes you look like a damned sight of a fool.[/quote]

I agree and disagree with Kam's post in the "L being used" thread. First of all, hate doesn't always produce murder, rape or torture, or anything of the like. I hate a few kids at school. But I'd never do anything to them, I just don't like them at all. Youya not have the right to judge anyone. But wouldn't it sound foolish to like soemone who beats on women and has no respect for anyone, I.E, a murderer.

Now, that doesn't mean I think hate is a good emotion, that's not the case. I can't see why anyone would hate to the point of raping anyone, or any of the examples in teh quote above.

I may hate some people, but I would never be driven as to do anything drastic.[/COLOR]

[Raiha]

[COLOR="DarkOrchid"][FONT="Times New Roman"]Love is a fickle mistress, but if you can find it, I won't begrudge you happiness. Rather, I'll be happy for you and possibly live vicariously through your relationship. I've been in love myself, but it usually ends in tragedy. Or animosity.

I hate everyone equally. My hate is spread around you all with great cheer and magnanimity. It's hard to be a racist though, when you hate everyone from every country everywhere....

Okay, so I don't hate everyone. I think I love Ikillion. And Gavin. And Vicky and Revelation and Annie. Except when she gets married.

But seriously, I think hate is an important feeling to experience, and not hating people makes you a dull boy. I believe it's important at times to give you a drive, perhaps to be a better person than that object of your hate, and also to give you a reason to not commit suicide. That and it also has practical uses. I'm a vegetarian! Because I hate vegetables![/FONT][/COLOR]

[Panache]

[QUOTE]Now, that doesn't mean I think hate is a good emotion[/QUOTE]
There is no such thing as a bad emotion in my opinion. Emotion can lead to negative things sometimes but that doesn't mean the emotion itself is bad. Hating something something evil is not bad or negative. Like I hate the action of murder. It's brutish violent and stupid.

Merriam Websters dictionary defines love and hate as this.

[B]Love[/B]
[quote name='"Merriam Websters dictionary"']strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties (2): attraction based on sexual desire : affection and tenderness felt by lovers (3): affection based on admiration, benevolence, or common interests b: an assurance of love [/quote]

[B]Hate[/B]
[QUOTE]intense hostility and aversion usually deriving from fear, anger, or sense of injury b: extreme dislike or antipathy : loathing [/QUOTE]

My personal definition of each word is different than Kams.

I use the term love in a couple different ways. When I greatly enjoy something or I like something a lot a say I love it. When I think about my close friends and family I think to myself that I love them. When I think about it like that I mean that we have a strong almost unbreakable bond between us. Then of course there is making love...which I don't say much because I think it beats around the bush. I am sure we all know what that means.

I use the term hate pretty loosely. And I honestly don't see an issue with that. Whenever something or someone does something I really really don't like I say I hate it or them. I use it in the sense of a strong dislike. Not some everlasting dislike and attempt to destroy someone or something. And I often use the word in a playful sense. Like when my friend went to a Porcupine concert(he lives in Scotland and I live in the U.S.) I was jealous so I said I hate you. Not a big deal. I was joking.

So thats my view on the matter.

[2010DigitalBoy]

[COLOR="DarkOrange"]I'm with raiha on the hating everyone equally scale, since I'm more than certain everyone has at least done something that indirectly makes me unhappy, though I suppose there are those I hate less than other I.E. my mum and pop and I guess my little brothers. And mabe that guy. Or that guy. you get my drift. Or her.

Love... is a weird concept, to say the least. When I think of love, I think of dedication and wholehearted caring which I utterly lack at the moment, sadly. There are people whom I do care about (some of whom are here, such as Fyxe and Prem) but I don't know abuot love... my thoughts on it can be summed up rather well with lyrics from Godfather's Lolipop by Shabutie...

"She screamed love is such a strong word, I said what if we took a word, deciphered the innocence and, well, uh, ******?"[/COLOR]

[Aberinkula]

[QUOTE]There are people whom I do care about (some of whom are here, such as Fyxe and Prem) [/QUOTE]

[COLOR="77656"]Same here. Love like a brother is the term. Which I use only rarely. And I do agree with Raiha, when I hate it's equally divided between the people.[/COLOR]

[Panache]

[quote name='Premonition'][COLOR="77656"] And I do agree with Raiha, when I hate it's equally divided between the people.[/COLOR][/QUOTE]
I heard that from somewhere...isn't that from a Slayer song?

Anyway Hate comes in degrees for me. There are people who do things that piss me off but rather than call that hate I will just say I dislike that persons actions. If they consistently do it I will start to hate the person. And you know some days I do hate everyone until someone snaps me out of it.

[Vicky]

[SIZE=1][B]WE HATE LOVE

WE LOVE HATE

WE HATE LOVE

WE LOVE HATE

WE HATE LOVE

WE LOVE HATE[/B]


...*cough*...

You need hate and love, methinks. You can have feelings inbetween but to me love and hate are at the very end of the spectrum - so I've never loved someone, nor hated someone. It's almost the same thing; you'd do anything for someone you loved and anything to hurt the person who hate.

I, personally, think that the two are strong words that are thrown around to easily. There's obviously things in between love and hate, I just think both are at the ends of the stick.

I think if people say they hate someone but wouldn't hurt them, then it's not hate they feel, rather something inbetween. Hate really is about not caring what happens... I think I've had enough anger management problems to come close enough to hate to know that the consequences don't matter because you despise and detest someone so much that only the here and now matters, when you just really don't care what happens to you as long as they get [i]your[/i] version of justice and you can't think clearly at all so you just [i]do it[/i] - that's hate. And I guess that's love to; only the ones who you truly love matter.

Equally, however, you can fall out of love and into hate, vice versa.

I don't know, that's just how I see it.[/SIZE]

[Rachmaninoff]

Personally I think, and I'm sure this is pretty obvious already, but there are degrees of love and hate. Love I think is obvious and hardly needs explaining but the hate? I can't recall more than a few times in my life where I have said I hate something and I actually meant it. For the most part I think it's too strong of a word to just toss out there. The same with love as well. I think telling someone you love them shouldn't happen unless you really deeply and truly love them, instead of saying you do when it's infatuation, which isn't the same thing at all in my opinion.

[Panache]

[QUOTE]I think if people say they hate someone but wouldn't hurt them, then it's not hate they feel, rather something inbetween.[/QUOTE]Well it could be that they fear for themselves so they don't wanna hurt them rather than they actually do care enough not to hurt them. Like I would love to kill this guy I hate. But I wouldn't be able to live with myself(not because I killed him but because I am now what I hate) and I know I would be punished by society.

[Odin M Yggdrasi]

Hatred is too strong of a word to be used lightly.

I don't think I need to say much more than that.

[Korey]

[FONT="Franklin Gothic Medium"]Oh boy, the Love- Hate thread. Man the things I could say here. But I'll just take my personal experiences out of it and just describe the things.

Love- Okay, first off this term is really abstract. People use this term too much and it's true meaning has been so detracted that it's lost its luster. You love your significant other, you love ice cream, you love other peoples pain (this is only a select few, mind you). But I guess, love is something that we all have for something in some way. In a sense, it's a strong liking for something, regardless of it being a physical or metaphysical thing.

Hate- This is a very strong word. Never in life has a term besides love been so abused. People just don't know how to use this term to accurately describe their feelings towards a subject. For example, if I said " I hate tomatoes" it wouldn't be an accurate reflection for my dislike of tomatoes? Certainly not. Do I want to exterminate all tomatoes and all who enjoy them? Do I cringe at the mere sight of them? No. So using the term "hate" is really very archaic.

Now, onto myself.

I use love pretty loosely, but when my girlfriend says "I Love You", I always say " I adore you" or something along that path. Why? Because that term just has little meaning now, for me anyways. I don't just love this person, I adore them/ am in rapture because of them...etc. But for things I like, I always say "I love *insert Korey's favorite thing here*".

Hating is not something I can do....no matter how hard I try. I never will find myself hating someone. It's just not a part of who I am. Not to say I am not capable of hate, but I mean that I can't hate someone for an extended period of time. Normally my emotions subside after a while and I find myself being able to stand that person again. I also don't condemn others. I find that people have some sort of redeemable quality and that keeps me hoping that they will display that quality in lieu of all their other things that I disagree with at the time.

Ironically enough, I think I had the term Hate in a sig of mine, but that's only for the song "I Hate Everything About You" by 3 Days Grace. It seemed to fit the Death Note motif I was going for. [/FONT]

[SunfallE]

[COLOR="RoyalBlue"][FONT="Lucida Sans Unicode"]My views on love and hate... hmmm.

[B]Love: [/B]That's a little hard to define since in general, there is very little that I truly love. There are things that I like and enjoy, but other that a handful of people I can't say that I love them. I just like them. It's a word that gets tossed around a lot and for the most part I think people don't think about how they use it out of context a lot. Though so long as you know what you mean, for the most part I think that's sort of a non-issue.

[B]Hate:[/B] Now this is a word I just don't use or rather don't really mean. I hear people comment on how they hate things and yet I doubt that they truly hate someone or something. For one thing, the energy required to maintain the intense feelings of hatred are something I can't imagine doing. Even when something has happened or someone has annoyed me beyond my acceptance, once I'm no longer around them that feeling goes away. I can't imagine truly hating someone or something. Instead I just have people I don't like or things I don't care for.

I think Vicky got it right in that love and hate are at the extreme end of the spectrum and what we feel is somewhere between those two and for myself, rarely is it at either end. Though I can say that there are more things that I genuinely love than I have ever hated.[/FONT][/COLOR]

[Gavin]

[SIZE="1"]In true geeky fashion, I'll allow Star Wars to explain my views on love and hate.

[quote name='HK-47']"Definition: 'Love' is making a shot to the knees of a target 120 kilometers away using an Aratech sniper rifle with a tri-light scope.[/quote]

[quote name='Yoda']Hate leads to suffering...[/quote]

And no, I don't find it a bit odd the two definitions come from opposite ends of the moral spectrum.[/SIZE]

[Aberinkula]

[COLOR="77656"][quote name='Yoda']Hate leads to suffering...[/quote]
...and Star Wars gimmicks leads to box office blowout and fandom.

Statements like these are too broad, hate [I]may [/I]lead to suffering is a right-on-the-mark statement that our friend 'The Star-Wars Writer' should have considered. First of all, I hate one kid, so that will eventualy lead to some sort of suffereing? Not likely, definitly not likey. Hate harbors darkness. Hate is a dark emoition, a terrible one, yea. But it's truly ugly when someone takes this into a new level. The point of murder and form of unjust acts are what lead to suffereing. Not really the hate itself. Sometimes, yes. But not every time.[/COLOR]

[Panache]

Well the person who you hate made you suffer in some way correct? So I think Suffering leads to Hate and Hate leads to more suffering on occasion. But then that wouldn't be epic now would it?

[Konata]

To put it simply, I hate love (as in loving people). But then again, I'm the kind of person that puts education and money over family, friends, and love =P

People loving people:
I find it unnecessary, and from what I've seen, many people use it irresponsibly and end up doing things like lowering their grades, committing suicide, or just putting it at a priority that's just... extraneous. Some stop paying attention to what's outside of love, and then there can be excessive drama that occurs as well. One of the things that bothers me is all of the school love life stuff. Students get too obsessed with their "special someone", and sometimes it turns out he/she isn't that special someone anyways. It's like, "Wow, I just screwed my grades over, and now I'm depressed because my boyfriend dumped me." All of that could've been avoided in the beginning. I'm not saying there aren't people that love others "responsibly", but when a relationship becomes intimate, I always see more people being irresponsible. But maybe that's just me and my schools.

People loving things:
However, I do find that loving something you do is good. Finding a compassion in your job, etc. Because that, in my opinion, could help you more in your future (Of course, there's always people that take it too far =P). Oh, and by "People loving things", I'm not agreeing to people loving things sexually. ;D

As for hate, I don't have much of an opinion on it because I'm not against it. But I don't really hate much anyways. Love, bad grades, and America's $1 stores.

[Retribution]

[font=Arial]I feel like the definitions of love and hate have been diluted so that we forget what they actually stand for.

Love is a term that is technically assigned to the feeling of deep affection and connection to someone or something. And while most would agree with me that this is a good definition, many would disagree with me on what situations one could accurately use the word "love".

I would say that a teenage couple does not feel love, but perhaps infatuation. They are simply not mature enough to understand or feel the profoundness that is true love. I don't say this to be condescending, but I personally believe that your teenage years are when you are personally developing and growing and finding yourself -- you are simply not finished growing, or at least not to the point where you can truly love your girlfriend/boyfriend. However, I would say that teenagers can love their parents. It is such a deep and long-term bond that I would say the parent and child do share something deeper.

Of course this is all abstract and case-by-case.

As for hate, I feel like it shares the same level of depth and strength as love, but in the opposite respect. To truly hate someone, you have to truly wish only ill upon them, to give them no sympathy in your mind. I find that hate is even stronger than love. Love is capable of great things, capable of inspiring people to sacrifice their lives for their love. However, I find hatred burns away all doubt and passivity. The best example I can give is how people behave in crisis -- during any genocide, one group is made to detest another and kill them. Although there can be those who love the detested group, rarely will there be as much power or will to save them as there is to kill them.

I guess my entire point of this long rant is to say that they are both extremely strong words. Do not use them lightly, so that they may maintain their potency in your mind. Very briefly, I'd like to wrap this up by adding in my favorite quote on love:

[B]1 Corinthians 13:4-7:[/B]

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”[/font]

[eleanor]

[quote name='Premonition'][COLOR="77656"]
...and Star Wars gimmicks leads to box office blowout and fandom.

Statements like these are too broad, hate [I]may [/I]lead to suffering is a right-on-the-mark statement that our friend 'The Star-Wars Writer' should have considered. First of all, I hate one kid, so that will eventualy lead to some sort of suffereing? Not likely, definitly not likey. Hate harbors darkness. Hate is a dark emoition, a terrible one, yea. But it's truly ugly when someone takes this into a new level. The point of murder and form of unjust acts are what lead to suffereing. Not really the hate itself. Sometimes, yes. But not every time.[/COLOR][/QUOTE]

[font="trebuchet ms"] As many people have already mentioned, hate and dislike are two separate things. If you really hate someone, really, I think hate is suffering. I agree with what Retribution said about hating taking away all sympathy, and that to me is suffering. Especially for young people, because it's hard for us to actually love or hate something.

I also have to disagree with the "hate everyone equally" thing. I don't think real hatred is something you can control, so when people say they hate everyone equally, I just take it as they dislike everyone equally.

To end my post, I'll say that I'm very quick to anger. I'm impulsive and often misuse the word hate. But I've found that being compassionate is more gratifying than being hateful. [/font]

[Fasteriskhead]

I've already written about love [url=http://www.otakuboards.com/showthread.php?t=55685][u]way[/u][/url] [url=http://articles.theotaku.com/view.php?action=retrieve&id=2026][u]too[/u][/url] [url=http://articles.theotaku.com/view.php?action=retrieve&id=2027][u]much[/u][/url] [url=http://articles.theotaku.com/view.php?action=retrieve&id=2448][u]elsewhere[/u][/url], so I won't bore everyone to tears about it all over again. However, I would like to share a dilemma posed by a teacher of mine which, I think, puts the question into perspective nicely.

Say you're offered a deal. If you take the deal, then you gain all the absolute certainty you could ever need in life for its decisions. You'll never again be caught flat-footed - you'll know for sure how every gamble will turn out, where every surprise will be, and when you can get ahead in your dealings. In return, you only have to give up any possibility whatsoever that anyone will ever love you. That doesn't just mean that right [i]now[/i] no one will love you, and whoever might love you [i]now[/i] will stop; it says that you will [I]never[/I] be loved for as long as you exist, period.

So, what do you do? Do you give up every chance for affection in exchange for absolute certainty? Everyone I've asked has said "no," and unless someone here is significantly different, I think I'll get the same answer. Truthfully, no one even finds it a difficult choice.

Anyways, I wonder if we ought to think for awhile about what it means that human beings are willing do this - to give up all the certainty they will ever need in order to keep the chance (not even a realization - just the [i]chance![/i]) that someone somewhere out there might choose to love them. Anyone here over puberty probably knows from experience that love can do terrible harm, and that it can be more painful than anything. It's perfectly natural, in fact, to try to keep oneself away from its jaws (at least as natural as hopping from one relationship to another in the hopes that one of them will stick). In a certain sense, you can't really get what it means to be human until you've had your heart broken. And by now (excepting the incredibly needy clingy people) we all know that we don't really need love to live - after all, we can get through a day just fine without someone to go home to. But it's quite different to live without any [i]hope[/i] of being loved at all (if not today, then maybe later). That, it seems to me, would be completely unbearable. I doubt I could summon up the will to do much of anything - least of all be hateful of those around me without my curse (since real jealousy is only possible when someone else has something that, under different circumstances, might have been mine). That last fact points to something often forgotten: only someone who hopes to be loved, whether openly or in secret, can really hate.

[Allamorph]

[quote name='Fasteriskhead']So, what do you do? Do you give up every chance for affection in exchange for absolute certainty? Everyone I've asked has said "no," and unless someone here is significantly different, I think I'll get the same answer. Truthfully, no one even finds it a difficult choice.[/quote]
[FONT=Arial]Funnily enough, I don't even need to know of the negative qualifier as part of the bargain to say no. Here's why:

Absolute certainty.

I don't want to know what people think. I don't want to know if I have secrets kept from me. I [I]certainly[/I] don't want to know what my next gift will be, or even that I'll be getting a gift. "Absolute certainty" is so dangerously close to omniscience that obtaining it would make life insanely boring.


I do not believe love is actually definable. Love isn't even an emotion as I perceive it, so much as it is a state of mind. To love a person or object or idea means that one would take actions and make sacrifices for said person or object (or idea) that one would otherwise not consider, for whatever reason. E.g.: I have three younger sisters. We squabble and snipe at each other on a regular basis because we are a fairly normal bunch of siblings; but if any one of them were to be threatened physically or emotionally, I would risk whatever necessary to end up between them and their aggressor. Even if we had just had the most vicious argument any of you could dream up, I would still do this for her, without hesitation.

Hate is basically the identical statement, excepting that the actions and sacrifices are now made [I]against[/I] the object of hatred. I have personal examples here as well, but I will not here go into what I would like to do to said object(s), for graphic reasons. For now, let's just say that I am a very intense person, and the more I hate something, the longer I allow it to live.[/FONT]

[Sojiro47]

[quote name='Allamorph'][FONT=Arial]I do not believe love is actually definable. Love isn't even an emotion as I perceive it, so much as it is a state of mind. To love a person or object or idea means that one would take actions and make sacrifices for said person or object (or idea) that one would otherwise not consider, for whatever reason. E.g.: I have three younger sisters. We squabble and snipe at each other on a regular basis because we are a fairly normal bunch of siblings; but if any one of them were to be threatened physically or emotionally, I would risk whatever necessary to end up between them and their aggressor. Even if we had just had the most vicious argument any of you could dream up, I would still do this for her, without hesitation.[/FONT][/QUOTE]

[FONT="Book Antiqua"]I find it interesting that you choose a sibling for that example. You and your sister(s) have been together a long time, as I have mine. But what you described I also feel towards people I hardly know (from time to time). So here's a question then, tho it might be a tad off topic. Would you say that it is possible to feel love, as you describe it, towards an acquaintance or stranger? [/FONT]

[Allamorph]

[FONT=Arial]Believe it or not, I have thought about that myself. The answer depends on how much life I sense in them.[/FONT]

[Sojiro47]

[FONT="Book Antiqua"]Good to know that I'm nit the only one who considered that, then. I find for me that that sensation tends to occur around people I meet through my Karate friends.

Thought I was going crazy there for a second. ^_~[/FONT]

[Guest Sephionos]

Love and hate are both the same thing with the same power. They both cause destruction and chaos. through love hate is born and sometimes through hate one falls in love. Their both forces used to fight and gain power from. Eather fighting to protect or fighting to detroy are both the same thing.

[Lia]

I personally believe the opposite of love is actually indifference.