Mentally Retarded at birth.

[Delian]

This topic is very sensitive...However my opinion....I would look at it from a medical point of view.....If the baby was physically and mentally challenged to the point where they wouldn't survive long after their birth, and it would be doing more harm than good to give birth to them...then my answer would be to abort...However, if they did have some sort of physical or mental disability but they could function in the outside world, then I would consider to keep it, I'm not heartless but there are so many things to consider.

[Guest Voodookanaka]

depends wether theyd live in pain or not... after birth id definately look after them though.

[woody]

Good question, this situation can happen to anyone.
I would keep the baby.

[Guest]

Well, if this was the case, i would have an abortion if i knew before hand, cuz why bring in a child, that will be socially and physically akward towards others? I mean, i dont think one persons mind can take that abuse. And the bills for the therapy, it would be too over whelming unless i become a billionare or if I marry a billionare. But i wouldnt have it anyway. Once i have children or a child it will be perfect, nothing wrong with it, i hope. *gulps*

[James]

[size=1]My cousin has had various mental problems in the past and for a while she was actually getting better.

But now she's slowly going downhill. Some days she'll be mostly fine, but other days, she'll be involved in a conversation and talking absolute rubbish.

Sometimes my aunt has to stop and say "What are you talking about?".

She doesn't do it to be mean, but sometimes my cousin gets a bit ahead of herself and needs to be kind of reminded to think about what she's saying.

In any case, I would not be in favor of aborting a mentally ill child.

However, as has been said, it depends on the extent of the illness.

If I had a child who was going to be born blind and deaf...as well as having physical problems, then I would probably be in favour of abortion in that scenario.

I mean, why bring a child into the world when their entire life will be nothing but pain and suffering?

Nuh uh. Sometimes death is a humane way of preventing lifelong hell. That's why I hate the whole "God doesn't intend for it" rubbish.

I'm sure God wouldn't want a severely problematic child going through their entire life suffering, either. If you believe in God, then you also believe that if you aborted such a severely handicapped child, God would welcome that child into his loving arms and they'd never feel an ounce of pain.

I'm not religious, but even I can see things from that point of view.

In any case, if the problem was relatively minor...such as only blindness, only deafness or only other small problems, then there is no way I'd be in favour of abortion.

The handicap is only what you make of it. And as has been said, you have to look past the problem and look at the person underneath.

When I went to visit my cousin in a psychiatric hospital when she was at her most sick stage, I met a lot of people there who had various mental problems.

And you know, they were the funniest, most insightful people I'd ever met. They weren't inhibited by image or religion...they were just genuinely good people who loved talking to their visitors. :)

Anyway, I've rambled a bit there...but those are my thoughts on the issue.[/size]

[Anti]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by BabyGirl [/i]
[B][color=deeppink]I'm afraid your terms aren't quite PC, Will. If you want to sound semi-correct, use mentally challenged...retarded is one of the biggest derogatory terms and I hate it.
[/color][/QUOTE][/B]

I have one comment, it is the medical term for that kinda situation....so his terms are fine...

I would...Iono, ummm....really not sure...so I choose a random vote...I would proubably keep it...

[Anna]

The purpose of having children is to bring new life into the world.
I don't think we as humans have all the right we think we have in determining who comes and who goes.
If a child were to be severely handicapped, I would keep it- or at least let it be born- let it have what it is entitled to: live in the way it was intended. This means even if it would be beyond our means to take care of it personally then we would find an institution for it to be cared for in, as long as it could live and progress.
Now, every situation is different, and it can sometimes be unwise to rule out options. If the baby would be incapable of living, or incapable of making recovery throughout its life, I would consider abortion. But, that would be my last resort.
It would be hard for me to have to live the rest of my life wondering 'what if' I took away that child's opportunity for a successful life afterall...

[Cecil]

I couldn't make that desecion, if I ever had a child like that I would let my wife make the descion. I know thing are changing but I'm saying who's going to take care of the kid? My wife most likely, and most likely I will be off at work earning money to support a handicapped child. Either that or I will decide to work really hard in making forturne or something like that so I can be home with my child.

Of course if I had to make a choice If they where mentally challenged and I mean really bad like they might never learn to talk, and wheren't capable mentally of getting anything better than a third grade education and I knew before it was born I would support abortion or an institution, also if they are going to be blind and deaf I would much rather let them be aborted because of the fact that they have nothing to live for and can't lead a good life at all. If it wasn't something like he would have to be in a wheelchair for the rest of his life... there's always the wheel chair olympics lol j/k. Actually if it was something like that I would love him/her like any father would to a normal child.

[Guest Akito]

I'm never going to have kids. Cause if I do, they'll probably turn on me for the hero/heroine.

[Lia]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Anna [/i]
[B]The purpose of having children is to bring new life into the world.
I don't think we as humans have all the right we think we have in determining who comes and who goes.
If a child were to be severely handicapped, I would keep it- or at least let it be born- let it have what it is entitled to: live in the way it was intended. This means even if it would be beyond our means to take care of it personally then we would find an institution for it to be cared for in, as long as it could live and progress.
Now, every situation is different, and it can sometimes be unwise to rule out options. If the baby would be incapable of living, or incapable of making recovery throughout its life, I would consider abortion. But, that would be my last resort.
It would be hard for me to have to live the rest of my life wondering 'what if' I took away that child's opportunity for a successful life afterall... [/B][/QUOTE]

i agree...everyone has a chance no matter what, and who knows maybe they will come up with some cure or some medication that can help

[BabyGirl]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Anti [/i]
[B][/B]

I have one comment, it is the medical term for that kinda situation....so his terms are fine...

[/B][/QUOTE]

[color=deeppink]What I meant by PC, meaning politcally correct, is what is the better-accepted term used by todays society. If someone called you retarded, you probably wouldn't think anything of it (unless it was meant in a mean way) because it has become know as "stupid", and as a derogatory term.

But the fact that it's carelessly thrown around and meant in a harmful way...it has gotten outdated.

I'm biting peoples' heads off, and I'm sorry for that...I get really worked up about this crap...I shall leave this topic alone for now :shifty:[/color]

[PiroMunkie]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Will2x [/i]
[B]If you had a retarded baby would keep it? I mean really really retarded, like it wouldnt never learn to talk and was some what deformed. And partially blind.

What would you do?[/B][/QUOTE][SIZE=1]I dont know to be honest, I've never had that situation[/SIZE]

[Heaven's Cloud]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by BabyGirl [/i]
[B][color=deeppink]I'm afraid your terms aren't quite PC, Will. If you want to sound semi-correct, use mentally challenged...retarded is one of the biggest derogatory terms and I hate it.

I'm trying really hard to not give my opinion on this because it is extremely one sided...of course I would keep the baby!

Gah, ok, I'm not going to get mad...but don't be surprised if this topic gets suddenly closed due to ignorance of our fellow members.[/color] [/B][/QUOTE]

[color=indigo]Don't worry BG, I got incredibly offeneded when I first read the topic. I kinda lashed out and that was why I edited my post. While I think the question sounds very heartless, I don't think Will2x meant it to seem that way.[/color]

[~Videl~]

If I found out my child was going to be severely handicapped and incapable of having a normal life ie. in constant pain then I would seriously consider having an abortion. My reasoning for this? I have worked in a nursing home for old people and those with diabilities and I know that most of them have had a decent quality of life but imagine this; you are blind deaf and dumb due to a rare genetic condition, you are unable to walk due to neurological degeneration and cannot even go to the toilet by yourself. A partially formed digestive system has let you unable to eat so food has to be delivered via a tube in your stomach which due to your low immune system is constantly infected. This is what a ten year old girl at this home was suffering from and it broke my heart. Her parents came to visit her most days but no-one even knows if she was aware of them or even recognised them. Don't get me wrong I'm not in favour of aborting every disabled child, I would love and care for any baby who could have a decent quality of life but I just think there are some cases where it would be kinder for that person to have never been born.

[Will2x]

ok jus to clear things up i wasnt trying to trying to sound mean when i said retarded im sure most people got the driff on what i mean anyway. and again thanks for voting, i encourage everyone to vote and show your friends this topic too!

as for me i couldnt picture myself constantly helping a child that wouldnt be able to understand what i was doing and would never be able to do anything but drool, and poop. but thats just me. i couldnt imagine that so ill try and just have safe full sex and make sure everything is perfectly fine.

so i can just pray and hope that ill never be in that situation and the baby comes out normal. and doesnt need anything other than glasses and braces..

[BabyGirl]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Will2x [/i]
[B]as for me i couldnt picture myself constantly helping a child that wouldnt be able to understand what i was doing and would never be able to do anything but drool, and poop. [/B][/QUOTE]

[color=deeppink]Not all disabilities cause a child to just "drool and poop", even if that [i]is[/i] sometimes the harsh reality of a situation.

I suggest you read up on different disabilities, both physical and mental...it may help you understand a bit...

[size=1]I'm not going to get mad or be mean anymore unless this gets out of hand...mesa promise...[/size][/color]

[Will2x]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by BabyGirl [/i]
[B]

[color=deeppink]Not all disabilities cause a child to just "drool and poop", even if that [i]is[/i] sometimes the harsh reality of a situation.

I suggest you read up on different disabilities, both physical and mental...it may help you understand a bit...

[size=1]I'm not going to get mad or be mean anymore unless this gets out of hand...mesa promise...[/size][/color] [/B][/QUOTE]

ok not all do, but either way id be ending up taking care of someone that doesnt understand anything at all, cant hear me and cant see. 20 years later itll be about 4'2 id have to spoon feed alot and if its not that bad it wont try and take off its diper and poop on the floor. i just dont understand, wheres the love in that, if it had the ability to learn math be able to read with some help and like be able to have feelings then thats defently something to keep. i wouldnt want a child that would jus sit there and stare blankly into the sky and every once and awile forgets to breath and has to have check ups once a week for the rest of its life sucking my money dry. that would not be anything anyone would want would they? i mean it wouldnt matter if i loved it or hated it wouldnt understand at all..i mean me and wife would be better of without it and so would it.

[BabyGirl]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Will2x [/i]
[B]

ok not all do, but either way id be ending up taking care of someone that doesnt understand anything at all, cant hear me and cant see. 20 years later itll be about 4'2 id have to spoon feed alot and if its not that bad it wont try and take off its diper and poop on the floor. i just dont understand, wheres the love in that, if it had the ability to learn math be able to read with some help and like be able to have feelings then thats defently something to keep. i wouldnt want a child that would jus sit there and stare blankly into the sky and every once and awile forgets to breath and has to have check ups once a week for the rest of its life sucking my money dry. that would not be anything anyone would want would they? i mean it wouldnt matter if i loved it or hated it wouldnt understand at all..i mean me and wife would be better of without it and so would it. [/B][/QUOTE]

[color=deeppink]Your ignorance is once again overwhelming me. Topic very very close to being closed...[/color]

[Anna]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by BabyGirl [/i]
[B]

[color=deeppink]Not all disabilities cause a child to just "drool and poop", even if that [i]is[/i] sometimes the harsh reality of a situation.

I suggest you read up on different disabilities, both physical and mental...it may help you understand a bit...

[size=1]I'm not going to get mad or be mean anymore unless this gets out of hand...mesa promise...[/size][/color] [/B][/QUOTE]

*walks over and gives BG a hug*

[Heaven's Cloud]

[color=indigo] Alright, i have been trying not to get too upset about this topic but I think I will post my final thoughts on Will2x last post. Wll, I think you are lacking a lot of maturity and compassion. You have to put forth very little effort in taking care of a disabled child and the amount of love you would recieve is well worth a few sleepless nights. My advice to you would be to never tell a girl that you go out with these feelings that you have, because I know for a fact that if any woman (or normal person) heard your logic they would spot you as being an incredibly uncompassionate person...[/color]

[Justin]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Will2x [/i]
[B]

ok not all do, but either way id be ending up taking care of someone that doesnt understand anything at all, cant hear me and cant see. 20 years later itll be about 4'2 id have to spoon feed alot and if its not that bad it wont try and take off its diper and poop on the floor. i just dont understand, wheres the love in that, if it had the ability to learn math be able to read with some help and like be able to have feelings then thats defently something to keep. i wouldnt want a child that would jus sit there and stare blankly into the sky and every once and awile forgets to breath and has to have check ups once a week for the rest of its life sucking my money dry. that would not be anything anyone would want would they? i mean it wouldnt matter if i loved it or hated it wouldnt understand at all..i mean me and wife would be better of without it and so would it. [/B][/QUOTE]
Its very, very sad that you would say that. I've read this entire topic and I'm very unimpressed to say the very least. If you want to be absolutely factual, you and your wife would be finacially better off without any children. Hell, you'd be better off, financially, if you didn't buy a house or a car and just went to work everyday and lived your life out as a homeless miser. But you would do that? I think not. The fact is, if you had a mentally challenged child, and you were willing to give it a chance, you'd more than likely find yourself attached to it. Do you truly know what is going inside that child's mind? How can you say that it doesn't understand love? Of course it would. Even if its in a simpler sense than what we are used to thinking of as love. It would love its mother and father as unconditionally as you'd likely find yourself loving it. Will, it helps to show a little compassion every now and then. It really does. You make it sound as if "normal", whatever normal may be(I could go on rambling about tha, but I won't), people are better than handicapped ones. We're all people. Like it or not. Some need a little help, but in the end, we're all the same.

-Justin

[Will2x]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Heaven's Cloud [/i]
[B][color=indigo] Alright, i have been trying not to get too upset about this topic but I think I will post my final thoughts on Will2x last post. Wll, I think you are lacking a lot of maturity and compassion. You have to put forth very little effort in taking care of a disabled child and the amount of love you would recieve is well worth a few sleepless nights. My advice to you would be to never tell a girl that you go out with these feelings that you have, because I know for a fact that if any woman (or normal person) heard your logic they would spot you as being an incredibly uncompassionate person...[/color] [/B][/QUOTE]


OK! you dont understand, if its a brainless child that would never do anything other than sit and breath and sometimes forget to do that and die while im asleep then whats the point? you go ahead and have a kid like that...as for me im not.

[Will2x]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Justin [/i]
[B]
Its very, very sad that you would say that. I've read this entire topic and I'm very unimpressed to say the very least. If you want to be absolutely factual, you and your wife would be finacially better off without any children. Hell, you'd be better off, financially, if you didn't buy a house or a car and just went to work everyday and lived your life out as a homeless miser. But you would do that? I think not. The fact is, if you had a mentally challenged child, and you were willing to give it a chance, you'd more than likely find yourself attached to it. Do you truly know what is going inside that child's mind? How can you say that it doesn't understand love? Of course it would. Even if its in a simpler sense than what we are used to thinking of as love. It would love its mother and father as unconditionally as you'd likely find yourself loving it. Will, it helps to show a little compassion every now and then. It really does. You make it sound as if "normal", whatever normal may be(I could go on rambling about tha, but I won't), people are better than handicapped ones. We're all people. Like it or not. Some need a little help, but in the end, we're all the same.

-Justin [/B][/QUOTE]


ok say i gave it a chance, and it needed special care that was quite costly, now do you understand? and say the child wouldnt be able to do anything other than live on till the day it dies, that is not a life at all, it would go to school and sit there and breath while the teachers constantly try to teach it, it would be incapable of anything. it would just live being nurtured till the day it died. and had you known this before time would you still keep it. the parents would constantly try and play with it, and teach it things, but it would no more than sit and breath...

[Justin]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Will2x [/i]
[B]


OK! you dont understand, if its a brainless child that would never do anything other than sit and breath and sometimes forget to do that and die while im asleep then whats the point? you go ahead and have a kid like that...as for me im not. [/B][/QUOTE]
That's completely ignorant. As I already said its sad the way you say what you say. How could you say something like that? If only you knew how deep you're going. It takes compassion to be human. I'm very sorry to see that you have none.

-Justin

[Sara]

[FONT=century gothic]Many people I know are against abortion on "principle." I just can't see that working for me. Principle can be a dangerous thing... Well, it's a blurred and broken line.

And there are no easy answers.

I hope and pray that I'd never be put in that situation. I also pray that if I was, I would be wise enough to see the right desicion and strong enough to follow through with it.[/FONT]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by BabyGirl [/i]
[B][color=deeppink]Will, I didn't mean to be rude, though I know I was. This one hits really [i]really[/i] close to home. It just hurts to know that there are so many people out there who could look at someone with a physical or mental handicap and see the [i]challenge[/i] rather than the person.

Besides, everyone has challenges, some are just a lot more apparent than others.

My "challenge" is the fact that I can't really open up to people...your challenge is ignorance.[/color] [/B][/QUOTE][FONT=century gothic]Jenna, you are a beautiful, strong person. Your brother is blessed to have a sister like you, and I am convinced that you will make a wonderful mother as well. ;)[/FONT]