Yukazi Posted August 4, 2011 Share Posted August 4, 2011 [font="Tahoma"]Let me tell you all a story. It's not one of my usual "I hope everyone gets a chuckle out of this" posts. It's a side-story that a lot of people don't know. What it's like for those of us who see the strongest person in their life being drained slowly and their every freedom ripped away. What it's like for the family of those who have cancer. We have all seen death. We have all gone to funerals of loved ones and friends. We're shocked by their passing, we mourn, and we are able to move on after a period of healing. Now think of that loved one slowly dying and there's nothing you can do to stop it. Doctors and Nurses will tell you that they will be fine. That there is nothing to worry about. We all know that's utter bullshit. They either don't know or they are lying to your face to make you feel better. The Doctors will tell you everything is on the up-and-up and you could wake up the next day to find out your loved one has passed. That's not the case here but it's a start. I have spent most of the past 5 years taking care of my mother who has cancer. In 2006 the tumor (Glioblastoma Multiforme) was removed, she struggled through Radiation and Chemo, and the doctors told her she would be fine. She struggled for years after suffering a blood clot which essentially crippled her right arm and the surgery affected her right leg. Years passed of gentle care, she climbed the ladder, and all was well. It wasn't nearly as terrible on anyone as expected.. Now it is 2011. In February of this year the tumor was back and ready to rumble. It seated itself in the hole the previous tumor had left after removal and we found that removal would be the last option. Why, you may as, would removal be the last option? She would never be the same. There was a very high chance that the surgery would disable her ability to speak, move, and in general be a human being. Radiation would have the same consequences. That leaves us with Chemo which, in case you are not aware, is the harshest thing you can introduce to your body without dying. It will kill any new cells, good or bad, to keep cancer from spreading. If you suffer a wound, it will take quite a lot longer to heal. It is not easy for the person suffering. They are confronted with their own mortality. None of us can imagine that unless put into a number of very specific situations. Even though I have hope I am constantly wondering if she will make it through this again, whether I am going to wake up and find her dead in her bed. To you, a few hours wouldn't seem like much, but for me, I witnessed her going from walking and talking normally to literally dying withing two hours. Quite a difference. Now imagine the symptoms coming on just after I go to bed. There would be no hope. I see the possibility of death looming over our home every moment of every day. I don't feel like I can leave the house for extended periods of time without someone being with her because of what could happen. My family tells me not to think of that "what-ifs" but how can I not? They did not see how quickly everything came tumbling down this time. I was the only one to bear witness. I understand that this is a very serious topic for a place like the Otakuboards but I thought a thread like this is needed. I cannot be the only one here that has watched a family member struggle or had a struggle themselves. If I may ask, I would appreciate any prayer for my mother. As for discussion, what are you thoughts on Cancer? I know that is a simple question to answer but everyone has a different experience with it in one form or another. Use this thread as a place to open yourself if you yourself need a place to seek hope, ask for prayer, or share your experiences.[/font] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lyndy Posted August 7, 2011 Share Posted August 7, 2011 [color="#008080"][font="Times New Roman"][size="3"]I never really thought much about cancer until I lost three family members from it -- two within one year (three, if you include my cat whom I loved more than anything in the world). It's... a harsh thing. Not really sure what happened to my grandpa, but my dad has had cancer for a very long time (more than one kind of cancer). He was overweight before getting cancer, and then after having cancer and all of the treatments, he was... super skinny, and he had no hair. I have never seen him before he got cancer, so I didn't like seeing him like this... But, it made him happy to see me for the first time after I was born, and I was able to see him before he passed away. The second time I was going to visit him, I was leaving from Illinois for Indiana (it's about a five to six hour drive), and I got a call right before I left saying he didn't make it. And to think that I was going to move in with him for the following school year... That week was very depressing for me because my own cat had cancer, too, I think. Two days prior, I had to watch him die in vain right before my eyes at 3 in the morning --and not be able to do [i]anything[/i] about it-- and then have school that day. Then there is my grandma; didn't really know her, but she had cancer for a long time, too. My mom and grandma didn't get along, but when they saw each other a couple days before my grandma passed away, they seemed really happy.. It seems like cancer brings people together and brings out the good in people... in a way. But after losing these people to cancer, cancer scares me a lot... Since my dad had many problems, I fear that I will get those problems at an early age. I already have one minor problem, but it's not life-threatening at the moment, but it could be if I don't take care of it. Anyways, I am really sorry to hear about your mother. I hope everything will be okay and I will keep her in my thoughts.[/size][/font][/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chibi-master Posted August 8, 2011 Share Posted August 8, 2011 The only time I've ever had anything to do with cancer was when my grandfather died from it. I hate to say it, but that didn't have too much of an effect on me. I think it was because he refused treatment. He just didn't give a ****. He just sat in the hospital and said that there was no point in someone his age fighting so hard against something that had spread so quickly. If he had acted a little more concerned or actually tried to stay alive, I think I, and in fact the whole family, may have been more devastated. I'd like to think that he knew that and decided that he was going to act like he didn't care one way or another about dying, if only for the sake of those around him. My grandfather was a bada**. At least in my opinion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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