RIP Desbreko 1988-2016

[Shinmaru]

There's no easy way for me to say this, so I will instead be straight with everyone: Last night I found out that Desbreko, a longtime member of and moderator at this message board, died a couple of months ago after spending much of the year battling cancer.

Des didn't keep his fight against cancer a secret, but it was really known only to those of us who followed him on Twitter (as far as I know Twitter was the only form of social media he used). He would give regular updates, always remaining positive even when the news got worse. Updates stopped a couple of months ago, however; I suddenly thought about him last night and got worried when I saw he hadn't tweeted anything since late August. I did some digging (this is the journalist in me coming out); suffice to say, I am sure as I can be that he has died.

If you knew him during his time here or at myOtaku/theOtaku or elsewhere, please use this thread to share memories of him. If you didn't know Des, your condolences are welcome all the same.

He was a dear friend to me. I interacted with him quite a bit on the boards and on the AIM chats people used to put together (lord, how long ago was AIM?), but it was really during our time on the theOtaku chats that I grew particularly close to him. We both loved video games and anime and talked about them a lot. For like 7 years we got together once a week and watched shows we were interested in and/or thought would appeal to the other. Even after we and others slowly drifted away from the site, this was a constant for me. Whether what we watched was good or bad (and, trust me, we watched some rank garbage at times; you can't really avoid it in anime), the experience was fun all the same simply because he was such a fun viewing partner.

The best part was when one of us chose something that truly surprised the other. One of the final shows we watched together was Gundam: Build Fighters. I knew Des didn't really care about giant robot shows at all (the typical core aesthetic and the style of drama wasn't really his bag), but he really appreciated the silliness and sincerity of Build Fighters. Even when he got sick, he took the time to watch the rest of the show on his own. I'm glad I was able to affect his life positively -- even a little bit -- during a difficult time for him. He did the same for me so many times over the years.

It hurts knowing that Des is not here anymore, but even now thinking of him makes me smile so much. He was a good person.

[jomz]

So the news to everyone was only recent? I was wondering why there is nothing about it everywhere until recently.

Hello shin.

Excuse me while I read your post.

-back-

I knew Des from the Otaku community chat. He was really nice to have around. I would ofen log-in and find him to be the last one on (most likely afk watching something or playing games, probably). His presence was always welcoming.

The shenanigans and BS of those times will always bring a smile to my face. Des, ever the reliable guy to have a screencap for any occasion.

I will always remember him for his "BRB Tea" statement and his taste in anime.

When I read about his cancer, I was shocked. I prayed and hoped that he'd get better. I rarely use twitter, so yeah, I had no news until recently. I was devastated, and saddened of this news.

You were too young to go, Des. I hope you are doing better now. enjoy your tea.

Thanks for posting this, Shin. 

Edited October 27, 2016 by jomz
More stuff posted

[Shinmaru]

So the news to everyone was only recent? I was wondering why there is nothing about it everywhere until recently.

Hello shin.

Excuse me while I read your post.

 

Yes. I'm not sure if any of us knew his family. I certainly didn't. I never met Des in person, and I don't know how much (if ever) he discussed his online activities with his family. The only way any of us knew what was happening was hearing it from Des himself. The only reason I found out about his death was because I knew a few basic facts about him and found an obituary that matched those facts and what I knew of his situation.

Edited October 27, 2016 by Shinmaru

[The Vampire: Ed]

I don't know what to say. I heard the news from Japan86 (aka Laura) and I was a bit shocked. I am sad to say that I don't have a great memory, so I've forgotten a lot of things that went on here some time ago. I used to be relatively active, posting mostly in the RP section and I remember doing quite a few with Desbreko as well. My best friend, Charles, was probably closer to him, but I remember at least participating in some OB chats with him too. He was a good guy from what I remember and it's sad to see someone lose their life, especially at such a young age. 

 

R.I.P. Despreko

[Japan]

Now I suppose this memorial tribute will be rather embarrassing and jumbled. At least it is coming from the heart and with honesty. His death and suffering came as quite a shock to me as I barely check twitter much anymore due to being busy. He was one of my first friends on here. He was always there when I had to stay up to finish a paper or a school project. He always had advice for issues I had and always had a screenshot to cheer me up. He also was a huge encouragement to me when I was dealing with depression and issues with my mom throughout high school and college. It was thanks to him that I even watched some anime and get into Zelda. 

I remember teasing him about his hair in a way that it would be fun to braid. Which he responded that he might have his future wife do it in private...guess what won't be happening now. I always liked his hair, though. Also, it was thanks to him that I fell in love with the name Jonathon. I knew his name after prodding him for it after a while. We teased each other a lot...in a good way. I regret never being able to meet him in real life or even talk to him this last year that he was alive. I just always assumed he would be watching moe anime and precure. It wasn't till I found out last night that this all changed. A guy who was like a little brother has passed and he suffered and I never knew until now. He was a good man and he was taken far too quickly. I'll miss you, Dessy.

[Charles]

Rob (Vampire Ed) texted me and I learned about this during my day teaching so I couldn't respond sooner.

The news breaks my heart.  I was not particularly close to Desbreko on a personal level, but I used to spend a lot of time on this site and in the silly AIM chats that were a daily offshoot of the boards themselves.  Therefore, I was able to see many of you as real people.  I remember telling Desbreko how he loved The Legend of Zelda so much that he actually looked like Link.  I believe I actually posted a photoshopped image of him as Link a long time ago and he loved it. I'm only just now remembering that.  

I remember reading somewhere that Desbreko had cancer because he mentioned it during the OtakuBoards Day pitch.  However, the idea that he wouldn't survive never connected with me. In fact, he actually apologized for not posting on OB day with what he was going through, as if he even owed an apology. It makes me sad that such a thoughtful, intelligent, and funny young man has lost his life at such a young age.  I could say that I remember that kid whom I role played with, talked video games with, or joked with, but sadly, and more importantly, someone's family is really hurting because they lost a tremendous person to an awful illness. 

I cannot believe that I am even typing this post right now.  Life isn't fair, but I'm glad that we have people like Desbreko, if even for a fleeting moment in the span of history, to make it worthwhile. 

Edited October 27, 2016 by Charles

[Shy]

This news makes me very sad. I've known Des for most of my life at this point, and he was someone I respected and trusted a great deal. We kept in touch over the years in passing. but only recently did I know anything about his illness. I remember wishing him well on Twitter just a few months ago, and now I wish I would have spent more time to catch up. It breaks my heart even more to see how much time has gone by since his passing and Michael piecing together the story. As Charles said it never occurred to me how serious his condition could get. I know we're all getting older... this is just so unfortunate. My heart goes out to his family, especially his brothers who I know he cared for a great deal.

There was no denying how capable and talented he was when it came to his passions. If I recall, he was quite quickly quickly made the moderator of the Zelda (Nintendo?) forum just after entering the OB scene. I can still remember the old patterned GIF of an avatar he used when he was known as JCGoudy. Back then he was mostly a gaming guy, but at some point he started to pursue anime a great deal. In no time at all he was an expert in that, too. We would do these old AIM chatrooms full of OB members and Des would be so quick to pull up a relevant screen cap from an anime I had never even heard from -- and he had taken the screen cap himself. This was a very impressive thing to do back then, I swear!

Des always held a steady optimism that was sorely needed on this site, and he kept his head above the fray on a lot of the random OB spats members would have. He was a great admin because nobody could dislike him. For different reasons a lot of us needed the kind of encouraging social outlet that OtakuBoards was in those days. We had precious few conversations in our many years and experiences together. I feel like he and I have always shared a quiet understanding. I'll miss him.

Desbreakfast.

[Sangome]

This just feels so unreal to me. This is the first time I've had to cope and grieve over the loss of a friend, both online and off, and I've basically just been going through this day in a haze. I've just dissociated from it all. 

I remember reading about his initial diagnosis and everything seemed like it was going to be okay, that it was easy to treat. I had worried earlier this year when he hadn't tweeted anything in about a month, but then he tweeted again and I was so relieved... and then I find this out late last night. 

He was such a sweet, funny dude, one of the best I'll ever know. The best Zelda fan, the best anime fan, the best computer and tech guy. His loss is felt by so many people, which just goes to show how likable and amazing he was.

I'm going to miss you a lot, Des. 

Edited October 27, 2016 by Sangome
adding things

[PiroMunkie]

A little bird brought this to my attention so I figured I'd rise from the ashes to offer my condolences.

I'm not particularly good at empathy and expressing feeling and all that good stuff, but when I was active on this forum I definitely considered Desbreko a friend and was saddened to hear about his struggles and passing. It's probably been over a decade since we've interacted at all, but I can still remember what he looked like (at least back then).

Not too sure what else to say. He will be missed, but never forgotten. I guess my presence here, if nothing else, is proof of that.

[John]

Though I wasn't close with many, there have been a lot of people I looked up to on OB as I was growing up, and even among them Des was kind of a figurehead. Part of that was just his admin status, I'm sure, but he also composed himself with a pleasant ease and steadiness that was rare on the internet. It distinguished him, and I'll remember him for that.

This is the first loss of a notable member on OB that we've experienced, isn't it (apologies if it's not and I'm overlooking someone)? If so, we're really fortunate to have gone so long without a tragedy like this.

[Katana]

I don't think I've had to deal with the loss of someone to cancer until now. Not someone who I was a friend of...or just knew. And it breaks my heart. I found out last night and just cried. I cried last night, I cried this morning, and I broke a few times at work. I am so utterly grief-stricken and sad over this happening and am still trying to comprehend that he has truly passed.

Did we ever find out why Des had an accent on Skype calls? That's one of those mysterious I don't think I had an answer to. And that's going by when he would talk, which wasn't super often. He was quiet and kind and had a screencap for freakin' everything. It was distressing how he could carry on a conversation with subtitled JPEGs but it was weirdly impressive. Now that I'm at a point where I can do that myself, I don't think of it as weird so much as how much it shows the passion and dedication one has to just sort of be that person. Des was that guy.

He was so funny, and so nice, and so willing to share his knowledge and help people who needed it. I use VLC and VirtualDub because he told me about them; just one of those minor things I would've never known of and gone on to mess with to make stuff with.

I wish there was a chance to say good-bye. I'm glad to have known you, Des.

[Panda]

I just found out about Des. and I am heartbroken. We became friends though our mutual love of theO and working together to help the community. Back in the day we would always send each other birthday messages since we shared the same day. He deserved many, many more birthdays. I am really at a loss for words as nothing I can think of really can covey all I am feeling. My thoughts and prayers to his family and friends, we will miss you always Des.

[jomz]

Come to think of it, I learned about video codecs, and the one I am still using now (CCCP) was a recommendation of Des. I also learned the difference of softsub and hardsub.

Also, I hope ImgUr don't go around deleting his account (due to inactivity). It'd be a waste to see all those 27,885 images  go to waste. ("All the anime screen shots you could ever want, plus a lot you probably don't.")

(my, Des' screepcaps sure are High Res - how do I resize this thing? O_O)

Edited October 28, 2016 by jomz
typo

[Desbreko's Mom]

Thank you to Laura for the beautiful flowers that were delivered this evening,  and to all of you for your memories of Jonathon, or rather Desbreko.   We miss him so much, and my husband and I sat here in tears ( good tears)  reading all the kind things that were said about our son. We knew only a little of his activities online, but we did know that he considered so many of you his friends.  A few weeks after Jon passed away I wondered how I could let you all know, but we were in such a daze that trying to get on the Otaku site never occurred to us.  Laura's note made me realize that maybe we could reach her and all of his friends here. We're both in our 60's and not tech savvy at all, so I hope you all will forgive us.  It's still hard to imagine our life without Jon in it, but hearing about him from you all has made it a little easier to bear.  Thank you so much for sharing.

[Petie]

I'm really at a loss for words. I unfortunately can't say I knew Des all too well but even still, I remember plenty of conversations we had and projects we worked on together. He was impossible to not like or not get along with and was a pleasure to be around.

I didn't keep up with Twitter too well myself so I missed a lot of the updates but I do remember hearing about the cancer but also never made the connection that there was even a chance he wouldn't recover. It's a painful realization to make now.

Des, thank you for everything. You'll be sorely missed.

[Japan]

Thank you to Laura for the beautiful flowers that were delivered this evening,  and to all of you for your memories of Jonathon, or rather Desbreko.   We miss him so much, and my husband and I sat here in tears ( good tears)  reading all the kind things that were said about our son. We knew only a little of his activities online, but we did know that he considered so many of you his friends.  A few weeks after Jon passed away I wondered how I could let you all know, but we were in such a daze that trying to get on the Otaku site never occurred to us.  Laura's note made me realize that maybe we could reach her and all of his friends here. We're both in our 60's and not tech savvy at all, so I hope you all will forgive us.  It's still hard to imagine our life without Jon in it, but hearing about him from you all has made it a little easier to bear.  Thank you so much for sharing.

It was the least I could do. I am glad it helped lead you here. He was an amazing person. I've cried so much.I commend you for posting. I know from having parents who are not tech savvy either that joining, let alone posting on a message board can be a daunting task. It really warms my heart that we managed to get our memories and thoughts to you. Thank you so much for sharing him with us all these years. 

[Kei]

Honestly, I still don't really know how to put how I feel into words regarding this. I feel like it's a bit surreal.

Des is someone that I feel so fortunate having met. Though he was always on the quiet side, when he did speak, he always had a way of making me smile. Being a moderator with him is something I consider an honor. Whenever I approached him with questions, he always had an answer. It made me want to do better. I feel like I owe him for that.

Des was partly responsible for getting me to love anime as much as I did. I can't tell you how many things he got me into. But because of him, I've been able to introduce those things to new friends and see how much enjoyment they get out of it--probably as much joy as he did showing those things to all of us. He was such a big, BIG part of this community in its heyday... It's just surreal to think that funny, silly, hard-working Des is no longer part of this world.

I'm so heartbroken by all of it. The world lost a good man.

[The Spectacular Professor]

Boy it's been a while. And I wish this reunion were under better circumstances.

(This is Ace, by the way. Why the butts did I change my screenname and why did any of you let me do it what is this pretentious mess.)

This came as a pretty hard shock to me, and I'll probably be affected for a while, as will everyone. Des was a fantastic guy, always quick with a joke or a kind word or an anime screenshot so eerily suited to the occasion that I'm still convinced he was conjuring them like some kind of cartoon warlock. Seriously, I tested him once with like three of the most ridiculous and impossible statements I could come up with and he had a screenshot for each one. It was a superpower.

I also remember him being a real stickler for video quality and insistent that his friends always had access to the best of it. I actually still have a DM from him on Twitter from back when I was looking to get into HappinessCharge Precure. He ripped the subs from one translator and manually overlayed them over another group's rips because the first group had compressed the video poorly, and then linked me to all the resources necessary to do it myself. It was a very above and beyond gesture and yet that sort of thing was entirely typical of him.

It goes without saying I miss him. And I'll be missing him for a long time. But the time I knew him will stay with me forever and I'm grateful he shared so much with me as he did so many other people. As a way of weird little tribute I started a new Link to the Past file in his name and I've been sporadically posting Miiverse updates on my progress. I know it was one of his favorite games of all time and I'm pretty sure he'd be a bit secondhand embarrassed at seeing how bad I am at it but it's a nice way to keep his memory fresh for me.

Mrs. Goudy, thank you for reaching out and contacting us. We all loved your son and it's hard for all of us, and certainly none more than you and your husband. But if we've done anything to help share the burden we're glad to have. He gave us a lot, it's only right we pay the favor forward.

[jomz]

Boy it's been a while. And I wish this reunion were under better circumstances.

I know, right?

[Mimmsicle]

Such painful news, it's hard to wrap my head around it. Des was a beautiful cornerstone in this community and will always hold a special place in many hearts around the world. He was kind, encouraging, sweet, funny, helpful, wise and a joy to interact with. Truly a wonderful man.

Goodbye Desbreko and thank you for letting us be a part of your life <3

[Gavin]

Saw Beth's Facebook post a while ago and as Kei said it feels so surreal. I wish I'd known him as well as other people did, he always seemed like a great guy, funny, insightful, thoughtful and willing to lend a hand.

 I'm glad people's thoughts/memories/stories have been of some solace to your Mrs Goudy, your son was a very special person here.

[SaiyanPrincessX]

I'm in disbelief. I know what it's like to lose someone from cancer, I lost my step-dad on July 4. 

I heard on here a few months ago that he had cancer, although it may have been an old post, considering the low activity lvl here these days. Then received an e-mail today from the OB. I was shocked then, and even more so now.

I didn't know him personally, but I know I'd talked with him here and there on the boards. Always friendly, a large figure within the community. I associated the name Desbreko with the OB. 

I'm so sorry to his family and friends for the life they lost, and I hope he's playing video games in the clouds, without pain.

[Ducky]

Just wanted to share some of my strongest memories of Des:

I remember one day, back when I was in college, my laptop was freezing and acting up. I was about ready to throw it out the window and try to replace it (with money I didn’t have and couldn’t get). I told Des about it and he said, “I might be able to help.” He very patiently walked me through a process I wouldn’t in a million years have figured out on my own, and my laptop didn’t give me trouble again for awhile. He was such a computer whiz. You can bet that after that, I went to him with my computer problems first thing.

I remember staying up all night to watch Scrapped Princess and then gushing about it with Des the next day, because it was one of his favorite animes.

I remember his endless bag o’ reaction images that he could whip out in the blink of an eye and that were always perfectly, suspiciously suited to the context. (It made me wonder if he had them catalogued by topic or something.) They always made me laugh.

I remember watching many of his video game streams, but the one that really stands out to me was his run of FF7. That play-through reduced Des to wheezing laughter more than once, and hearing him crack up was one of the best parts of it.

I remember when he came to stay with me and Missy for a week, how shy and thoughtful he was. How obvious it was that all he really wanted to do was chill with us. He treated us like his priority, and was so kind and considerate through the whole visit. We watched a lot of movies and anime that week. It was a good time.

I remember Des as quiet and soft-spoken, but with a quick humor that often surprised me. I remember how generous he was with his time and attention. I remember him always being around, always available if someone had questions or needed help.

Des was one-of-a-kind, and we'll all miss him very much.

[Korey]

Saw Beth's Facebook post a while ago and as Kei said it feels so surreal. I wish I'd known him as well as other people did, he always seemed like a great guy, funny, insightful, thoughtful and willing to lend a hand.

 I'm glad people's thoughts/memories/stories have been of some solace to your Mrs Goudy, your son was a very special person here.

Hey all, popping out of the ether to pay my respects to Desbreko.

Desbreko was the moderator who asked me to become part of the staff long ago. I was so honored back then because it was Desbreko that was asking. Even back in '07 his name had weight and somewhat of a legend behind it. I remember Boo trying for the longest to get him on the OB Podcast and when he finally did I was on vacation, heh. 

My experience with Des is that he was always willing to lend a hand, or a screencap (or both) and was the silent observer in the chat. If I ever had a question on moderation or tech, Desbreko was the man I ran to. Desbreko also made a few of my Avatar/Banner sets! He was a kind heart and a keen mind. 

May he rest in peace. 

See you, Space Cowboy.

[SunfallE]

Like a lot of you I found out yesterday about Des. It breaks my heart in so many ways since I remember so many good times with him around. From his screenshots in chat to his video game walkthroughs to him just being that kind and thoughtful guy that he was. It's hard to imagine not being able to hit him up and watch some new anime and giggle at all the new screenshots he would take. Heck, even my avatar is from a show he got me started on. =(

I lost my dad to Kidney cancer and I remember how much that hurt. My heart goes out to his family since I know the pain they must be experiencing right now. I hope they find some peace in knowing just how much he was loved by his friends here.

Rest in peace, Dessy. You'll be missed.

Edited October 28, 2016 by SunfallE