Commentary: "Crawling in the Dark" lyric

[Lady Macaiodh]

several nights ago, i couldn't sleep for about 4 hours b/c i was thinking about this.

i'm sure most of you have heard the song "crawling in the dark" by hoob-something-or-other (can't remember). there's this one lyric that really got to me:

"is there something more than what i've been handed?"

obviously, he's talking about the circumstances of his life (he's dissatisfied). at first, i thought the answer to that question must be yes. of course there's more to life than what we have--there's always something better.

but then i realized the true meaning of this. [i]all we have to work with is what we've been handed.[/i] people are born into circumstances, with certain talents & intelligence & family situations, etc. & some people are more fortunate than others in that respect. but what i realized is that it doesn't really matter what we've been handed. what matters is how we use it.

for example, someone could be born into poverty, apply themselves in school, get a scholarship, & become a famous nobel prize-winning scientist. but another person could inherit a million dollars & blow it all on drugs. these are just 2 examples, there are tons of others & different ways to look at it. another would be that a person is born w/ moderate means & lives a mediocre life--not an unhappy life, but not a terribly successful or important one either.

the reason i am posting this is b/c i always thought i'd gotten a pretty raw deal. i felt that my intellect was my only real asset. i've had more problems than most people my age. but you know what? i'd rather it be this way, b/c i wouldn't be who i am, & i know i'm a stronger person b/c of it, & once i [i]am[/i] successful, i will appreciate it a lot more.

[b]i was thinking about all this in jail. yes, i just got out of jail for something very stupid that i did, which is why i haven't been around in a few weeks.[/b] i was in a really miserable, self-pitying state, kept asking myself why. but then i realized i had taken something good i'd been handed & squandered it. it was my own fault, & i paid for it.

i'm putting this really badly. but the main thing i want to say is:

[b]take what you've been given & run with it. take the leap, maybe you'll fly. no one controls your future but you. we all have the potential for greatness.[/b]

[DeathKnight]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Lady Macaiodh [/i]
[B]
i'm putting this really badly. but the main thing i want to say is:

[b]take what you've been given & run with it. take the leap, maybe you'll fly. no one controls your future but you. we all have the potential for greatness.[/b] [/B][/QUOTE]

[color=crimson]But the problem is i've been taught for most of my life I am nothing. Heh. So that really just bounces off all the curses and yelling my parents did at me as a kid, making me feel so imperfect that I wanted to be someone else so bad I roleplayed all the time [b]In real life[/b].

I guess what i'm trying to say is, that this is great advice but my attitude really cant accept it. Too far gone I suppose. o.o

I dunno what i'm tryin to say. Confused. Coughs.... I should shut up ;)[/color]

[Heaven's Cloud]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Lady Macaiodh [/i]

[b]take what you've been given & run with it. take the leap, maybe you'll fly. no one controls your future but you. we all have the potential for greatness.[/b] [/B][/QUOTE]

[color=indigo] Wow, I read this thread several times because I thought it was very insightful. I have to agree with your response to those lyrics, all we have is our own individual talents, what we do with it is up to us. Thank you for the insight LM, and I'm glad your back:) [/color]

[Lady Macaiodh]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by DeathKnight [/i]
[B]

[color=crimson]But the problem is i've been taught for most of my life I am nothing. Heh. So that really just bounces off all the curses and yelling my parents did at me as a kid, making me feel so imperfect that I wanted to be someone else so bad I roleplayed all the time [b]In real life[/b].

I guess what i'm trying to say is, that this is great advice but my attitude really cant accept it. Too far gone I suppose. o.o

I dunno what i'm tryin to say. Confused. Coughs.... I should shut up ;)[/color] [/B][/QUOTE]

this really upsets me, b/c you've been fed a load of crap. but so was i. you're still young, when i was your age i thought the same as you do. give it time, & think about what i said. you're better than those people. & if you let them do this to you, they win, you lose. i know you're a very strong person--use the strength you have & you'll be fine. i'll be thinking of you, you've always worried the hell outta me. :nervous:

[Spikey]

i remember that song... i am real young to be on these boards. i am 9 years old. i love these boards, and there is not a way that i wouldn't. i have promblems with me too. i am a real good kid is what mom says. but i like being weird.

so i do like that song, and i ask my self the same question.

[RicoTranzrig]

[COLOR=darkblue]

I'm just like anyone else, rich or poor...life isn't easy...each time I want something, I have to strive for it...like in some of my classes, the solution to the problem is right in front of someone but I have to hack at it for a bit longer to get it...

My parents were raised without electricity, without modern 1960's technology in a remote part of asia...they had nothing...absolutely nothing...yet I'm sitting here in front of a computer in the U.S. and wonder now how in the world did they manage?

Even for me, it was an uphill battle...living in a one room apartment in a shoddy part of town...went to school at an early age and they thought I was mentally deficient...well, 'cause my parent's had to work and no one was ever home besides the sitter. But all three of us strived hard and now we have it good...aside from a few problems here and there.

Now that I think about it...if I had to live life over again, I'd prefer starting off with nothing...so I can see myself for who I really am and what my capabilites are rather than having someone else tell me or inherit a relative's success.

[/COLOR]

[Anna]

*hugs LM*

You're absolutely right, and everyone ought to take that insight seriously. I'm sorry you were in jail :(. Our law class went to one, the one where they do executions in our state :nervous: it must have been awful, mentally if nothing else, and I'm sorry you had to go through that. v_v But what makes me happy is what you've brought out of it; wisdom of experience to share with others. I had never thought of those hoobastank (<-- ??) lyrics that way. But anyway, it's good to see you around again LM. :)

[Darkness]

I have always thought of things that way, but never have I heard a better saying for it. It'll make you think. But, I've beat myself up over life stuff enough for awhile.

[BabyGirl]

[color=deeppink]::cries:: Beautiful, Lady M, beautiful...

That's the way I try to look at life...all of my hardships, no matter how big or small, will just help me to be stronger in the end. I wish everyone could understand how to see the world like that :([/color]

[Pressure]

[COLOR=purple][i]"Every day it's like a war against the mirror, can't take the person starin' back at me, 'cuz I'm a hazard to myself. Don't lemme get me, I'm my own worst enemy, rather you and all yourself. So irritating, don't wanna be my friend nno more, I wanna be somebody else."[/i]

I love Pink to death, but that won't get you anywhere in life. I was born into a family with a father on wellfare and a mother who is a child of 2 alcoholics.

My life has just been friggin peaches and cream..

But I know that even if I was born into such horrible conditions that no one should have to live with, I'm still a betetr eprson than many of those born into better conditions. Because I can take what little I have and turn it into appreciation. I know that I'm living the life of a goddess compared to many in other countries, and I'd ratehr live like this with the appreciation, than be one of those snobby, skinny-*** preppy bitches who look down on the fact that their parents are lawyers, and doctors, and work for the CIA, or FBI whatever..

It annoys the hell out of me that they are taking for granted what they were given. Their parents worked very hard so that their kids didnt have to live the way they did, and its like they are throwing it back in thier parent's faces.

Makes me sick..

There is more than what you've been handed, but you have to work for it and never give up. I'm determined to make sure that when I have kdis, they don't live like this and have to go through the self pity and self loathe that I go through every day b/c I don't have a father to bring the the school function "Doughnuts for Dads" and because I'm not as rich as the near princess bitchy girls at my school. My kids will live the high life, but appreciate it.

I like what I've been handed, it could be better, but then again, it could be worse.[/COLOR]

[DeathKnight]

[color=crimson]"[i]Me[/i]"

I hear you talk about your family life
I wish I knew just what that means
I guess my mother never loved my dad
And now I wear it on my sleeve

My sister called me just the other day
It felt so good to hear her voice
My problem is I don't have much to say
I guess she doesn't have a choice, and I'm sorry

Look at me I'm so pathetic
I can't believe I'm just an addict
I've never needed anyone to help me
I'm begging you to please come save me from myself, save me from my...

My mothers always tried to change herself
She never learned to let things be
She doesn't know how bad she messed me up
'Cause now she seems so fake to me but I love her

Look at me I'm so pathetic
I can't believe I'm just an addict
I've never needed anyone to help me
I'm begging you to please come save me from myself, save me from myself

If you push me then I won't fall
I've been programmed to take it all
And shove it way down inside

Like my father... Like My father....

I'm so pathetic
I can't believe I'm just an addict
I've never needed anyone to help me (I'm failing it)
I'm begging you to please come save me from myself

I hear you talk about your family life
I wish I knew just what that means - Staind


This song is the best song I can relate to totally. Heh, and everything it says I feel.[/color]

[Justin]

It's good to see you back, Lady M.

As far as what you've said: It's beautiful. People, at some point or another, must always learn to pick up their pieces and put them back together. That's the only way the world will get anywhere.

-Justin

[velvet paws]

I'm lucky to be born into a family that just 'manages'. My parents split up 5 months ago but they are still friends. It took 5 constant years of stress and arguments, but it's all for the best and things are good now. Both of them are always in debt to someone, and we've often had threats of baylifs (sp) and times when you had to eat all the food you were given at dinner because there'd be no more until the next day no matter how hungry you were. Often you had to wait months just to get a new pair of cheap-o trainers too. We still managed to have a TV and a telephone though, even though alot of the time we were on incoming calls only and had to give up sky. Now we're doing okay...enough money to get the stuff we need and a little to spair for treat foods, going to the cinema etc.

As for me personally...we'll I've been bullied for a year at junior school but after a month or so I stood my own ground and ended up just fighting everyday instead of being a complete victim. Sometimes I even won. I have a very low self confidence but I feel that year has thought me not to take sh!t if I don't have to and I feel stronger for it.
I also went through a suicidal patch..but hey I'll stop rambling now heh

:blush:

[Pressure]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by velvet paws [/i]
[B]I have a very low self confidence but I feel that year has thought me not to take sh!t if I don't have to and I feel stronger for it.
I also went through a suicidal patch..but hey I'll stop rambling now [/B][/QUOTE]

[COLOR=purple]God don't I know how this feels..

I moved down to Maryland from New York, leaving all my friends behind, when I was 10. It took about a week before my mom could get my papers in order for me to go to school. I didn't speak to her once during that entire week nor for three weeks afterwards. I was in the fifth grade and while I wasn't the most popular thing, I did make some friends and it was about 4 months before the school year ended.

Well then I got to 6th grade and life was hell. Oh sure the beginning of the year was fine, until I was accused of being a witch. (at the time I wasn't) It was like the Salem Witch trials all over again. I was hated, feared, shunned, and treated like a total freak. Everyone hated me and I only had like 2 friends.

Things didn't improve in 7th grade either. A kid in my school actually brought a 75 dollar gold cross to school and kept pointing it at me to "shun me" or "protect himself from me". Either way, I missed a few days in school because I was at home hyperventalating and crying non stop. Several times a week I would put a knife to my throat or wrists.

And then I got to th grade. It was like someone had pushed a magical button. It all stopped. I was called a witch maybe twice the entire year and it was by friends who were just kidding around so it didn't bother me. I started [U]actually[/U] practicing wicca and became a real witch and was astonished to find so many others in my school were also witches in hiding.

My self confidence has sky rocketed this year, since becoming literally the best artist in school, I had my art teacher come up to me one day and tell me she wished that her project had come otu as well as mine :D

I took what I was handed and after I was finished with the self loathing and pity, I built up tolerance to the people who called me a witch, and some of them even appologized! O_O;;;

Don't have low self confidence Velvet Paws.. its pointless.. love yourself.. we all love you :) :love: :love2: :love: :)[/COLOR]

[Lady Macaiodh]

thanks for the compliments, everybody.

you all have a lot of really good insights.

this is why i love coming here... b/c i have friends like you. sometimes, you guys are the only people i can really talk to.

[Pressure]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Lady Macaiodh [/i]
[B]thanks for the compliments, everybody.

you all have a lot of really good insights.

this is why i love coming here... b/c i have friends like you. sometimes, you guys are the only people i can really talk to. [/B][/QUOTE]

[COLOR=purple]Awwwww..

:bawl:

*Gives LM-san a big dakishimeru*

Don't worry.. we're always here..

:angel:[/COLOR]