Writing <no title>

[Poetic Prophet]

this piece actually has a title, the only problem is, i forgot it. this poem is kinda old, so its not likely the board i previously posted on is still around. but peep anyway.

Images in my subconscious are like dreams when wide awake.
Ethereal circumstances occurring in a surreal state.
My head struggling to reach the surface, my legs strenuously kicking beneath.
My larynx incapable of producing sounds, to bring someone to my relief.
During this situation or rather, tribulation that would cause a god grief.
The hands of time move with greater haste as my breath knows only a steady decrease.
This insufficient oxygen results in constriction within my thorax.
Strains in my cortex as I attempt to incript my final thoughts in a poetical format.
Im confined beneath the surface, the weight of my burdens attempt to make me submit.
I attempt to accelerate, only to decelerate at that very same instant.
Pulled to deeper fathoms, the auroras that were once in reach begin to fade.
The surrounding substances become darker and colder, as the pressure compresses my frame.
My death is apparent, my soul on the verge of becoming lost, twenty thousand leagues under the Atlantic?s surface.
Until the visions are interrupted by hands desperately retrieving my physical from the frenetic current.

[Raiha]

[COLOR=royalblue]For the love of god. I thought we all knew that you should stick to one thread for all your poems. I've said it once, and I'll say it again. Put all of your poems in ONE thread. Two threads in two days by the same person is BAD. Get the point?[/COLOR] :demon:

[Poetic Prophet]

first of all, im new so i didnt know that. and secondly, umm i posted this **** a few days after the first.

[Raiha]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Poetic Prophet [/i]
[B]first of all, im new so i didnt know that. and secondly, umm i posted this **** a few days after the first. [/B][/QUOTE][COLOR=royalblue]1: I don't care.

2: If I see anything like the **** I got rid of in your other topic again, I will send you a nice little letter about the wonders of being banned.

3: Oh BTW, have a nice day.[/COLOR]

[Spikey]

[COLOR=royalblue][B]I like the poem. You better listen to Raiha. I like the poem, just seperate your lines more. They need to be seperate like this:

I watch the sky,
It flows fast by.

And such like that. Also you lack grammer, and punctuation. Punctuation will be a great help in poems.[/COLOR] [/B]

[Guest Shift]

Nice peom but for some reason i have a weird feeling that i've heard it somewhere else before...*looks from left to right*

[Pastbyer]

[color=indigo]Nice poem. It sounds like me.[/color]