Writing sick & twisted

[Ravenstorture]

No name for this, I think it was just one of thise moments where you wake up at one in the morning, fumble for a match, a candle, a crayon and a flat surface and milk the sudden inspiration for everything it's got. Hope it was worth it.
Ravenstorture

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As the day yawns before me I feel like an insomniac at the first glimpse of nightfall. I am lying in the corner of a bare, unfurnished room on an uncovered mattress. There is nothing else in the room except for a rumpled pile of dark clothing and a couple of spent syringes sitting in a glass of water. I glance over my scarred, tracked arm at the magnificent creature lying beside me. It had not yet woken, so I rose quietly and crossed the floor diagonally on my toes, using the wall to steady myself as my head swam. I paused to gaze back at the beautiful tangle of flesh and linen when I reached the doorframe. The mouldy carpet felt damp under my cold feet as I crossed it to the bathroom, which looked like something out of a prodigy clip, cockroaches and all. The mirror was fractured and old, but it still told me all I needed to know. I ran my fingers through my hair and closed my eyes as the scene before me swam sickeningly. I expected the feeling to disappear after a few seconds, but this time it lingered, and the intensity of my disorientation ascended until I found myself curled up on the cold tiles. I clutched my head in my hands tightly as shuddering spasms convulsed through my body and pain strobe lighted through my head. A sudden rush of heat up my back and into my prickling scalp turned the red vision to black and I awoke later to the feeling of a warm hand on my skin. Taking my hands away from my face, I found my surroundings were much too bright for my unadjusted eyes. I gasped and retracted my head, shutting my eyes tightly. Arms slid under my knees and shoulders to lift my fragile body up and carry it back to he soft reassurance of the mattress. I wait until the darkness is reinstalled by the heavy swish of a blanket being drawn over the dirty window, and relax my eyes. Opening them slowly, I blink though the nausea and reach over to find the glass of water and sip it timidly, holding the sharps back and wincing at the sound made by needles against glass. Leaning back again I relax my tense back muscles and hang the glass over the edge of the mattress. Still holding it, I contract my hand around it as agony unfurls in my head and spreads down my neck and shoulders, like a thorn infested vine growing down my spine into my legs. When the pain reaches my feet, it doubles back up my body, and the glass in my hand shatters, feeding the pain already nesting there like a coiled snake. I lie there feeling the shards of glass in my hand pulse in time with the rhythm of my weak pulse and he pain intensify and subside with every shuddering breath.
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:demon:

[liamc2]

Its not sick and twisted. .it is merely a window, this could be used very well as anti drug propoganda. .

The writing and thought gone into it is amazing, all you need is spacing

I apologise If I offended you in any way by saying that :)

[Guest cloricus]

you annoying person, I was doing just great useing chat and IRC and you had to come along and tell me to get back in to forums (old crapy and slow) and well I'm complaining becouse I'm here now... hmm I take it I have to leave a story? I right one becouse there nothing better to do - tell me if its any good.

--- Sitting at the wall with all the grim and mosse of uncleaned streets wondering what would happen next. It was 2 years after the great wall fell and nothings changed we still starve and even lease money in the contry than before. People would stumble up to use and ask for anything with always the same result, then they would stumble on some times falling and not even getting up. I dreaded dieing that way, but haveing not eaten anything for the last 4 days I fear I will.

I would go on but for the fact that it sucks.

:)

[Raiha]

[COLOR=royalblue]Okay, well, Liam's right. Spacing is nice. And otherwise it's nice. LOL, anti-drug propaganda here..........[/COLOR]

[Guest cloricus]

I think its good as it is and if any one whanted a finnal copy you could correct it then.

[Ravenstorture]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Raiha [/i]
[B][COLOR=royalblue]Okay, well, Liam's right. Spacing is nice. And otherwise it's nice. LOL, anti-drug propaganda here..........[/COLOR] [/B][/QUOTE]

So, what EXACTLY do you guys mean by spacing? do you think it's a bit too crammed together? I agree. It happens when you write a bit too.... passionately. And then dont edit is properly afterwards. Sorry 'bout that.

[Guest cloricus]

I see what you mean by spacing just like the one I sent you then. I didnt edit it at all sorry, and it rambles on a bit. Its in two parts becouse they only let 5000 chars to be sent at one time.

:)