Adam Posted May 10, 2002 Share Posted May 10, 2002 I got a letter from the Federal Trade Commission today. Here's some highlights. [b]"TO: Company President & Privacy Policy Administrator; [url]www.pokecheats.com[/url] FROM: Federal Trade Commission, Burueau of Consumer Protection"[/b] What a promising beginning! They sure did their research, I'm the President (!) of a company (!) named "pokecheats.com" (a domain that's been idle for the past two years). Hey because it's a company, maybe I should be President and CEO too! Next time someone asks me "Adam what's your job?" I can respond nonchalantly, "I AM THE PRESIDENT AND CEO OF A COMPANY." If they then asked in disbelief, "says who?" I can spit on their dirty face and say "says the Federal Trade Commission, Burueau of Consumer Protection." [b]The Children's Online Privacy Protection Act (COPPA) has special requirements for commercial websites directed to children under 13 or children's areas of general audience websites.[/b] That's nice but this site doesn't even make any money - how can it be commercial? [b]A recent survey by FTC staff indicates that your website may not be in full compliance with COPPA's requirements with respect to privacy policies.[/b] What? The Federal Trade Commission has a GROUP of people who get paid to look at pokecheats.com and then vote on whether or not I followed some bureaucratic rules? No wonder they're so anal, if my job was to browse pokemon sites that have been dead for years and then mail their owners I'd be pissed off too. [b]Please review your website in light of the law's requirements. FTC staff will visit your site again in the coming weeks to determine whether legal action if warranted.[/b] LEGAL ACTION. WOW, imagine if I came to court. Adam: Good evening, I am the President and CEO of a major international corporation. Federal Trade Commissioner: Hi, we understand you didn't link correctly to a privacy policy on your web page. Adam: What webpage would this be? FTC: Um... "Pok-ah-cheats dot com" Adam: You must be mistaken sir, I have clearly not updated that site for the past 2 years. FTC: Uh....Um....Uh...We understand you didn't link correctly to a privacy policy on your web page? We understand you didn't link correctly to a privacy policy on your web page?We understand you didn't link correctly to a privacy policy on your web page?We understand you didn't link correctly to a privacy policy on your web page? Adam: ........Fine you're right - you win. Judge: Case dismissed, I hereby sentence you President and CEO Adam to 100,000 years in prison. --------------- Well that wasn't a fun conclusion. So instead of fighting them and taking them to court I devilishly initiated a clever strategem... Remember this quote: "FTC staff will visit your site again in the coming weeks to determine whether legal action is warranted"? HAHAHHAHA. VISIT [url]WWW.POKECHEATS.COM[/url] RIGHT NOW AND SEE WHAT THE "FTC staff" will come upon when they visit it again. ;) Always silly, -Adam Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Hikaru Ichijyo Posted May 10, 2002 Share Posted May 10, 2002 Umm FTC, well obviously this is a hoax, I'm pretty sure the [B]FCC[/B] regulates stuff related to the internet!;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Justin Posted May 10, 2002 Share Posted May 10, 2002 It's amazing that someoen would even take the time to type that letter... -Justin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adam Posted May 10, 2002 Author Share Posted May 10, 2002 No hoax! It was sent via snail mail and came with a big booklet on policy and was addressed from the Washington. -Adam Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flash Posted May 10, 2002 Share Posted May 10, 2002 Watch your step Adam! They'll put you in [I]Cyber Jail[/I]... Where you can get [I]Cyber Raped[/I] by [I]Cyber Convicts[/I]... It's true. I've been there, I'd know... Nasty place. Heh, anyway... What the heck? Privacy Policy? All this lingo confuses me... And why would they send you all that junk over a website that's been down for 2 years? Man... Sounds like a cleverly illustrated hoax to me... :P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
James Posted May 10, 2002 Share Posted May 10, 2002 [color=royalblue]Just to note: any ".com" site is classed as commercial. And thus, that site needs to abide by relevant laws. The only real issue here is that pokecheats is inactive and has been for a long time. Other than that, the authorities who monitor websites do this as their job. :)[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest cloricus Posted May 10, 2002 Share Posted May 10, 2002 HAHAHAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAA - ok sorry.... They are some sad, sad, sad people! are you sure it wasnt a hoax? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Vampire: Ed Posted May 10, 2002 Share Posted May 10, 2002 Would I be wrong if I called them idiots? How about pieces of [B][BEEP][/B]? Or maybe assclowns? Am I wrong? And if not, then which would suffice? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desbreko Posted May 10, 2002 Share Posted May 10, 2002 [color=indigo]Umm... umm... I'm trying to imagine their reaction when they see the sight... *starts laughing so hard that his insides leap out his throat, and he has to stuff them back down again so he can take a breath* ............ Well, now that [i]that's[/i] over... I liked the part about the vodka. :laugh: :twitch: :laugh: :toothy:[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
(<AA>) Posted May 10, 2002 Share Posted May 10, 2002 Lol, how come this stuff just keeps on happening to you? What if it wasn't a joke or hoax, but got SERIOUSLY delayed, It could happen since this is snail mail... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Morph Posted May 10, 2002 Share Posted May 10, 2002 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Final_Flash [/i] [B]Watch your step Adam! They'll put you in [I]Cyber Jail[/I]... Where you can get [I]Cyber Raped[/I] by [I]Cyber Convicts[/I]... It's true. I've been there, I'd know... Nasty place. Heh, anyway... What the heck? Privacy Policy? All this lingo confuses me... And why would they send you all that junk over a website that's been down for 2 years? Man... Sounds like a cleverly illustrated hoax to me... :P [/B][/QUOTE] [size=1] So, [i] thats [/i] the true story eh? I knew there was something thicker... Heh, Well Adam, those idiots got what they deserved eh? I Eat Your Vodka! [/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zidane11 Posted May 10, 2002 Share Posted May 10, 2002 That was hilarious! I wonder what they will do when they read that message. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sui Generis Posted May 10, 2002 Share Posted May 10, 2002 Oh man thats great!! *falls out of his chair laughing* That'll teach those COPPA dudes *cough idiots cough* to mess with the all mighty Adam!! Lol...yeah great job Adam! Too bad we can't see their response once they see that! *keeps laughing* Heh I needed a good laugh before I go off to school and be sentenced to hell.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JCBaggee Posted May 10, 2002 Share Posted May 10, 2002 [color=red][size=3]LOL!!! That was great! Be sure to share their response with us if you get one! Three cheers for Adam! Fight for your rights!!!(or something like that...)[/color][/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vegitto4 Posted May 10, 2002 Share Posted May 10, 2002 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Adam [/i] [B]I got a letter from the Federal Trade Commission today. Here's some highlights. [b]"TO: Company President & Privacy Policy Administrator; [url]www.pokecheats.com[/url] FROM: Federal Trade Commission, Burueau of Consumer Protection"[/b] What a promising beginning! They sure did their research, I'm the President (!) of a company (!) named "pokecheats.com" (a domain that's been idle for the past two years). Hey because it's a company, maybe I should be President and CEO too! Next time someone asks me "Adam what's your job?" I can respond nonchalantly, "I AM THE PRESIDENT AND CEO OF A COMPANY." If they then asked in disbelief, "says who?" I can spit on their dirty face and say "says the Federal Trade Commission, Burueau of Consumer Protection." [b]The Children's Online Privacy Protection Act (COPPA) has special requirements for commercial websites directed to children under 13 or children's areas of general audience websites.[/b] That's nice but this site doesn't even make any money - how can it be commercial? [b]A recent survey by FTC staff indicates that your website may not be in full compliance with COPPA's requirements with respect to privacy policies.[/b] What? The Federal Trade Commission has a GROUP of people who get paid to look at pokecheats.com and then vote on whether or not I followed some bureaucratic rules? No wonder they're so anal, if my job was to browse pokemon sites that have been dead for years and then mail their owners I'd be pissed off too. [b]Please review your website in light of the law's requirements. FTC staff will visit your site again in the coming weeks to determine whether legal action if warranted.[/b] LEGAL ACTION. WOW, imagine if I came to court. Adam: Good evening, I am the President and CEO of a major international corporation. Federal Trade Commissioner: Hi, we understand you didn't link correctly to a privacy policy on your web page. Adam: What webpage would this be? FTC: Um... "Pok-ah-cheats dot com" Adam: You must be mistaken sir, I have clearly not updated that site for the past 2 years. FTC: Uh....Um....Uh...We understand you didn't link correctly to a privacy policy on your web page? We understand you didn't link correctly to a privacy policy on your web page?We understand you didn't link correctly to a privacy policy on your web page?We understand you didn't link correctly to a privacy policy on your web page? Adam: ........Fine you're right - you win. Judge: Case dismissed, I hereby sentence you President and CEO Adam to 100,000 years in prison. --------------- Well that wasn't a fun conclusion. So instead of fighting them and taking them to court I devilishly initiated a clever strategem... Remember this quote: "FTC staff will visit your site again in the coming weeks to determine whether legal action is warranted"? HAHAHHAHA. VISIT [url]WWW.POKECHEATS.COM[/url] RIGHT NOW AND SEE WHAT THE "FTC staff" will come upon when they visit it again. ;) Always silly, -Adam [/B][/QUOTE] Well done adam, well done. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarkM Posted May 10, 2002 Share Posted May 10, 2002 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Justin [/i] [B]It's amazing that someoen would even take the time to type that letter... -Justin [/B][/QUOTE] That and its amazing someone would even read that letter!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flash Posted May 10, 2002 Share Posted May 10, 2002 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by hot head [/i] [B] That and its amazing someone would even read that letter!!! [/B][/QUOTE] If you got an official looking letter from Washington, what would YOU do? Throw it away? :P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarkM Posted May 10, 2002 Share Posted May 10, 2002 Well Final Flash i proally wouldn't. I know tons of people that would throw it away. But i woul probally read it and make fun of them on the site just as adam did! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kuja Posted May 10, 2002 Share Posted May 10, 2002 [SIZE=1][FONT=century gothic][COLOR=crimson]i just love how yall assume this isnt real... have any of you thought that all it takes is for one person to drop that a site isnt following the rules and they look into it? so if one of those wonderful spammers decided to do something they could write (well get someone else too since they act like they dont know how) to the senator/congressman and they would have to get someone to look into it. now i hope they dont look into it again adam because well... pissing off the government is a bad thing especially since you know what im preparing at the moment... woulda always be nice to have the government shut you down before i had the chance to do my thing ... ;)[/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vegitto4 Posted May 10, 2002 Share Posted May 10, 2002 No offense kuja, but I am guessing, that most eople didn't see to much grammar, they didn't understand that post. Please Clarify. I am interested in what you are tryin to say, after " i just love how yall assume this isnt real" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Matt Posted May 10, 2002 Share Posted May 10, 2002 [color=red][b]LOL. :rotflmao: That's great. lol. i haven't laughed this hard all day.[/b][/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kuja Posted May 10, 2002 Share Posted May 10, 2002 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Vegitto4 [/i] [B]No offense kuja, but I am guessing, that most eople didn't see to much grammar, they didn't understand that post. Please Clarify. I am interested in what you are tryin to say, after " i just love how yall assume this isnt real" [/B][/QUOTE] [SIZE=1][FONT=century gothic][COLOR=crimson]well im sorry that your too stupid to understand what is being said... oh well not my problem. now if you cant understand what is being said... go back to school cause the only thing im missing is comma's and i type like this everwhere, and james went to another site and said my grammar was good. and it was the same as it is here so i guess that the grammar expert himself is finnally off his grammar kick so u can join him ;) anyway dont matter adam's post is now going in my file to bring up in my lawsuit against o3[/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE] ps if your gonna bash my grammar... spelling and grammar of your own would make it look like you had any clue what you are talking about... wtf is an eople? and i believe it is enough grammar not to much, even so woulda been too no to ;) haha this is almost as funny as adam posting about me in staff *sigh* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heaven's Cloud Posted May 10, 2002 Share Posted May 10, 2002 [color=indigo] Now c'mon guys play nice... Well, back on topic, Adam your reply was was hysterical. My suggestion to you is to make one hundred xerox copies of that letter and then you have an unofficial document to use as toilet paper. I find this letter truly hilarious for one reason...the FTC is saying that your old site is innapropriate but no one will do a darn thing about the smut mongers IMing me every friggin five minutes to announce that I have been approved for a credit card, or a new porn site has been opened. The stupid aol blocks don't work and I hate turning on my away message. It just goes to show you the perpetual lack of common sense and decency our government agencies have. Anyways Adam, hurrah for your reply, it was the funniest thing I have seen all day...[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlueGender Posted May 10, 2002 Share Posted May 10, 2002 ROTFLMAO I cant believe the actually wrote you a letter about a site that you have not updated in two years and it is a poke site lol. It shows you how our government spends their time all day sitting in an office checking if old poke sites are up to standard :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ryan Posted May 10, 2002 Share Posted May 10, 2002 There's Adam for ya!:) I like the way you handled it Adam... But one major question: What are you going to do if it [b]isn't[/b] a hoax. I seriously doubt it is true, but just in case what are you going to do? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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