Vegitto4 Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 Have any of you ever been stabbed in the back, by your best friend? here's my story. Saturday night, I foudn out the the girl I have fallin for and my best friend had " messed around" a little bit. Now they had only kissed, but they kissed twice. Now, after the first one, they realized what it would do to me, and then they kissed again. I'm about to kill someone, and I dont knwo what to do, so, advice would be good. I have talked to my freidn, patrick, and I haven't talked to amy yet. However, I am out fo town. I dont know what to do. HELP!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mist Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 [color=red][size=1]I think you should talk to your friend and the girl you like [b]calmly[/b]. Tell them how you feel about it and vice versa. Unless they already knew about how you felt for the girl; I'd shoot them both in that situaition. :D Seriously, just remain cool; showing them ruffled feathers isn't gonna help any. The guy must have been a good friend if he was you [b]best[/b] friend and the girl must have been special if you liked her. You don't want to rant because that only makes things worse. Get their side of the story and make the decision of what to do there. Hope that helps! :toothy:[/color][/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amibasuki Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 well, there's definitely good reason to be mad at your 'friend', if you had told him how much you liked her before they did that. as for your crush, unless she said she liked you back, you can't really be mad at her (well, you can, but you know what I mean, right?). it certainly wasn't very good taste for her to kiss your best friend though. just go talk to 'em as soon as you can so you guys can get it all figured out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Justin Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 Once a cheater, always a cheater. If they realized what it would do to you, then did it again anyway, they aren't worth your time. And this Patrick guy needs to learn what it is to be a man... -Justin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amphion Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 Knife in the back... They sound like scum to me. To me, betrayal is one of the most evil things you can do to someone. I say if they both knew how you felt, tell them to get lost. But if they did not really understand your feelings its more understandable. The decision is yours though, you have to decide. You should always do what you feel is right. But if the same thing happend to me, and they both knew how I felt, I would tell them both to go to hell and never speak to me again. But doing such can be very hard if your really fallen for this girl. Just do what you think is right. Thats all I can tell you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harry Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Vegitto4 [/i] [B] Saturday night, I foudn out the the girl I have fallin for and my best friend had " messed around" a little bit. Now they had only kissed, but they kissed twice. Now, after the first one, they realized what it would do to me, and then they kissed again. I'm about to kill someone, and I dont knwo what to do, so, advice would be good. I have talked to my freidn, patrick, and I haven't talked to amy yet. However, I am out fo town. I dont know what to do. HELP!!!! [/B][/QUOTE] You're exagerating it. If he was your best friend he wouldn't have done that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amphion Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Harry [/i] [B] You're exagerating it. If he was your best friend he wouldn't have done that. [/B][/QUOTE] Ha! That doesnt mean ****! Your best freind is very capable of stabbing you in the back, I had my best freind stab me in the back right in front of my face, well he more or less sold me out, but either way you want to put it, it was still a betrayal of trust. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mist Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 [COLOR=red][SIZE=1] [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Harry [/i][B]You're exagerating it. If he was your best friend he wouldn't have done that. [/B][/QUOTE] :rolleyes: Puh-lease! Shows how much [b]you[/b] know about reality...[/SIZE] [/COLOR] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarkM Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 Well you just have to make sure it dosn't happen again Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kain Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 First of all it entirely depends on if you and this Amy girl were a couple.If you were this is what to do: For your "best freind" you need to break his jaw.Don't ever be freinds again no matter what. Break with your cheatin girlfreind Amy.If you two weren't together then there is nothing you can do.I'm sorry if that sounds a little harsh but it's the truth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amphion Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 Safer cloud is right. But if they both knew how you felt then they could have at least come to you first. It shows they where inconsiderit (sp?) of yor feelings and cowards. I know its hard to just end a freindship with two people you have history with, but sometimes its for the best. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mist Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 [color=red][size=1] Yup, yup; they're right, but you should still try to talk to them [i]first[/i]. As for breaking people's jaw, if there's a postion, I'd love to help. :toothy:[/color][/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Matt Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Justin [/i] [B]Once a cheater, always a cheater. If they realized what it would do to you, then did it again anyway, they aren't worth your time. And this Patrick guy needs to learn what it is to be a man... -Justin [/B][/QUOTE] [color=red][b]I agree totally with you justin. Dump the girl, hurt the guy, and move on. If she's a cheater, you can do better. And if this patrick fellow is a backstabber, you can also do better. I suggest blacmail. Find something about him that he doesn't want anyone else to know, and tell EVERYONE. :D That should make you feel better. Well, it made me feel better. I told my best friend during school that I was going to ask this girl to the prom tomorrow. So when I asked her, she said that my best friend had asked her yesterday after school and she had said yes. I was sooooo mad at him. So, what I did, is tell everyone about his problem in the size department (he is the only one who doesn't shower after gym lol). That made me feel better. :D[/b][/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PiroMunkie Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Justin [/i] [B]Once a cheater, always a cheater. If they realized what it would do to you, then did it again anyway, they aren't worth your time. And this Patrick guy needs to learn what it is to be a man...[/B][/QUOTE][color=indigo]I agree with that for the most part. Once a person stabs you in the back, they will just continue being that way [i]unless[/i] you show them that it really really hurt you. If they are really your best friend they should feel really bad and not do it again. That's how it worked with me anyway.[/color][quote][i]Originally posted by Harry[/i] [b]You're exagerating it. If he was your best friend he wouldn't have done that.[/b][/quote][color=indigo]That's a very naive statement. I had all my friends stab me in the back at once. [i]"Et toi, Brutus?"[/i] My advice is just to let them [u][i][b]know[/b][/i][/u] that what they did really hurt you. Get mad at them, but don't get out of control with it. So don't yell. I mean, you might yell at first, just to let them know you mean business, but once you start talking, just calm yourself down. Just make sure they know you are really pissed off, and crushed by what they did. If they can't understand after you're done talking to them, you are better off without them. But if they really are your best friend, they should understand.[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Justin Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 If you love this chick, and your friend violated that, your friend doesn't deserve your friendship. Granted, everyone stabs, and gets stabbed, in the back every-so-often. However, I believe there is a certain line one should never cross. Thus, my statement "And this Patrick guy needs to learn what it is to be a man..." -Justin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Delian Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 You mentioned that your girl cheated on you with your best friend twice. Why didn't you dump her after the first time... These things should not be tolerated. If they did this to you once, you know that they'll do it again (or she will at least), no matter what disgustingly sweet apologies come out of her or your best friend. Considering you believed them, they probably thought they could get away with it a second time. People like that don't deserve respect or consideration. Cheating is one of the lowest things you can do in a relationship...and with your best friend involved...well, I just find that insulting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PiroMunkie Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Justin [/i] [B]If you love this chick, and your friend violated that, your friend doesn't deserve your friendship. Granted, everyone stabs, and gets stabbed, in the back every-so-often. However, I believe there is a certain line one should never cross.[/B][/QUOTE][color=indigo]You are not always going to want to lose that friend though. If you have a best friend that you have known since forever, you are not going to want just say forget him/her. Even if the case is this severe. If it was any other person besides a best friend, I would say forget the person and move on. But best friends are special. When all of my best friends stabbed me in the back (at once even, as I stated before), and despite how much I [b][i][u]DESPISE[/u][/i][/b] things being done behind my back, I still didn't want to lose them cause I had known them for a long time. It was just another bump in the road. Obviously some bumps are bigger than others, but if they are really your friend(s), then you can get over it. Vegitto4, if you don't want to just forget one of them, I would find out who kissed who the first time. [i]That[/i] person is the backstabber. The second time was merely done in the moment, whether they knew you were going to be hurt or not, they kissed a second time because they were caught up in the moment. If it was the girl who initiated the first kiss, I'd say just forget her. [i]"There are plenty of fish in the sea."[/i] as the saying goes, and obviously she doesn't care much for you if she would do such a thing. If you best friend was the one who did it, I would talk to him about it. And get the whole deal straight. Why did they kiss? Does he like her? Or was it just a fling? If he likes her, I would give him the choice between you or the girl, and the decision would be final. If it was just a fling, again, let him know that you are hurt by this and he should understand. Also, if ti was your best friend who kissed first, then I would still be somewhat friends with the girl, but obviously not interested in her anymore. She would probably fade away eventually.[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Justin Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 I can understand where you are coming from with the statement about not wanting to lose your best friend. In that light, you should at least leave a lasting impression. -Justin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amibasuki Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by PiroMunkie [/i] [B][color=indigo] Vegitto4, if you don't want to just forget one of them, I would find out who kissed who the first time. [i]That[/i] person is the backstabber. The second time was merely done in the moment, whether they knew you were going to be hurt or not, they kissed a second time because they were caught up in the moment. If it was the girl who initiated the first kiss, I'd say just forget her. [i]"There are plenty of fish in the sea."[/i] as the saying goes, and obviously she doesn't care much for you if she would do such a thing. If you best friend was the one who did it, I would talk to him about it. And get the whole deal straight. Why did they kiss? Does he like her? Or was it just a fling? If he likes her, I would give him the choice between you or the girl, and the decision would be final. If it was just a fling, again, let him know that you are hurt by this and he should understand. Also, if ti was your best friend who kissed first, then I would still be somewhat friends with the girl, but obviously not interested in her anymore. She would probably fade away eventually.[/color] [/B][/QUOTE] it shouldn't matter if it was a fling or not. if he had enough respect for and cared enough about his friend, he wouldn't have kissed her. the only circumstance in which the friend would have been totally innocent was if the girl was all over him, but it doesn't sound like this is the case. it just depends on how forgiving you are, I guess. if it was me who got backstabbed, I'd forgive the friend [i]only[/i] if they were sincerely sorry for what he/she had done. but absolutely no third chances. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charles Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 My opinion won't be long or deep, but it will be honest. A friend isn't someone who hurts you (numerous times in this instance) and interferes in your relationships. It is obvious that this guy isn't your friend or he would care somewhat about your feelings and respect your personal life. The girl isn't worth your time if you both have a relationship going. She obviously doesn't seem to care about you as much as you care about her. You would be better off, and happier for that matter, if you found someone that cared about you and your relationship together. Unless you've never professed your feelings for her, [I]to her[/I], and her mutually to you, then she's not in the wrong here. Remember, [i]any[/i] relationship is based on trust. Once you find that trust has been removed from the equation, there is no healthy relationship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heaven's Cloud Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 [color=indigo]Well, I am not sure if I understand the situation. You said that you were "falling" for the girl. Were you dating her? If not, then I think your friend is slightly justified (although he still deserves a tap on the jaw). He could also be attracted to the girl. If he hooked up with her, then she is obviously attracted to him and you missed your initial opening...although you could steal her back and he would have to accept it. If you were dating, then give your friend a nice crack in the jaw, what is a little tap between two friends? As for the girl, while you could just dump her, don't you think it would be fun to get a little revenge;)[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Juu Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 first chance- didn't use it very well..... Does she deserve a second?? First, how did this all start? Who kissed who first? that's the important stuff ya gots to find out before you get mad at either one o em. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Delian Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 Does it really matter who initiated the kiss. If the other person had any regards or respect for their relationship with you (whether it was friendship or otherwise), they wouldn't have gone along with it....and twice of all things. If the girl was getting it on with your friend, the least she could have done was let you know about her feelings towards your best friend and set you straight about your relationship with her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sere Tuscumbia Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 Whoo, Delian, get a CLUE! It WOULD matter who kissed who, because if you're friend is innocent, you can't go getting all hot and bothered at him when he didn't do anything! If he DID kiss HER then . . . a sledgehammer and his head should be very good pals. And if the second one was just a "caught-up-in-the-moment" kinda thing, then I think there would be grounds for restoring the relationship between the three of you. But if it wasn't . . . as I said, a sledgehammer and some peoples head's will be very good pals. But the main thing is: DON'T GET ALL HOT AND BOTHERED WHEN YOU'RE TALKING TO YOUR FRIEND!!! Trust me, it DOESN'T help anything! You end up getting in an irrational shouting match that will mangle your relationship beyond repair! I've done it . . . it's not fun. So just keep a calm head, and talk it out. Discuss your feelings with the both of them, and if it's too personal of an attack, dump them both and get on with life. That's all I have to say on this matta. Good night. ~!*Sere & Co.*!~ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Juu Posted July 2, 2002 Share Posted July 2, 2002 exactly. If u don't know who kissed who first, and you accuse one of em and get all mad at the one that didn't do anything, you could lose one or even two of your very close friends. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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