Writing Alone: A fic i need advice on.

[Alexa]

Um, this is a fic I'm working on, called Alone. Its about an orphan girl named Aura, with her little sister Rira trying to figure out the past she forgot.:cross:
-------------------
Chapter 1: My Choice.

The 7 year old girl squealed as she took her baby sister from her ill mother's weak clasp. Aura gently shifted the squirming bundle in her arms. She moved the cloth to reaveal a pale face with large blue eyes and jet black curls framing its face. "Wow, my sister?" Aura's mother nodded and smieldwith pain. "Her name is Rira." The woman slumbed back in her bed. "Mama?" The small child urged, her purple eyes large with concern. Her mother placed her hand gently on her daughter's arm. "Take care of Rira, Aura, my child." she gave one more pained smile to her daughter and died. "Mama! Mama! Wake up!" the little girl cried. "Mama!" Her eyes brimmed with cold tears. "MAMA!"
***

Aura kicked of her sheets. "That dream again." She mumbled, remembering the saddest time of her life, yet the happiest. The 13 year old brushed her blakc and pupele streaked hair behind her and glanced around her milky moonlight-bathed room, and her eyes rested on her little sister,only six years old, asleep in her bed. "Rira." She whispered. Knowing her siter only had her in life, Aura was over protective. Her mother died when Rira was born, and their father died in a car accident a year ago. Ever since, the girls had lived in an orphnage. Aura snuggled deeper in her pillows and tried to sleep, but the drowsy feeling wouldn't come. She slipped out of her bed, only dressed in a white shirt and black shorts.
Though she nkew well that they weren't allowed out of bed at night. Aura felt guilty about leaving her little siter alone, but knew that she had to go out for a while, to think and deal with her emotions from seven years ago.

[John2]

Wow. That's a good start.
And you are water, right?