Help w/relationship.(long story)

[GhostofSalvtore]

ok I am having some troubles with a girlfriend of mine. Let me give you some background. We have been talking for about 2 months, and I met her through a friend. I first started talking to her online and met her about 2 or 3 weeks after we 1st talked. Now I met her and I will say this she is so good and I am crazy about her ever since, (love at first site I guess) but when I met her she didnt seem to take to much interest in me, but she talked to me the day after and I guess she really did. So now its been about a few weeks since I first met her and we have been tryin go do stuff but she got grounded and couldnt do anything. Then last week I coulda gone to her high school football game but I was sick, one of the worst things that could have happened. So on that Saturday she didnt talk to me at all and I waited till Sunday till I finally got to talk to her and she says that we should go on a "break" b/c she is gettin grounded and really needs to focus on her grades. Now this is all understandable for me but I just need to know if she is likes me. This past week we havnt talked hardly at all, and I am just getting the impression that she has lost all interest in me and the "breaK" thing was just an excuse for her. Now last night I talked to her on the internet and I have noticed for the past few days that on her "away message" she has had this guy named Erik and wanting him to call her. Now I didnt say anything cuz I may make things more worse but I asked her about it last night and she said he is just a friend. So I was like okay, but later on she puts on an away message that says "call me on her cell, especially Erik w/this face:smooch: "
so I called her and just kinda poured my heart out and asked what was going on if she was gonna quit on us or what her deal was. Now I really am just crazy about this girl and will do anything to get things right w/her. So if you have anything you would like to say on the situation please respond. Because I am just about to:flaming:. Thanks for hearing me out, whew that felt nice to get out

[Transtic Nerve]

Ok, you just turned 16... And you only knew her for a few weeks. Thats just about the right amount of time for "testing" a relationship. My thoughts, from my experiences, would be that she is afraid to hurt you and suggested the break for whatever reasons. I also think she figured you'd get the "hint" and be gone with it. I doubt she expected you to be so attached to her.

Here's what i suggest. You've not known her that long. I mean, it's been a few month or whatever. You've been going out with her for less than a month. You're young. You have so much to look forward to, don't waste you time obsessing over what was not meant to be.

[GhostofSalvtore]

Well than she must have lied about somethings then cuz she says "O we will get back together after I get ungrounded and all this cwap" so I am going to believe what she says and if it just becomes clear to me on how she handles all this. Like today we actually talked for a lil while and she seemed pretty normal w/me but she really hasnt said anything about me calling her unless I bring it up"like I will say so did you get my message" and she will say yes but than thats just it.
Still for some reason I just have a feeling maybe this will work out. and I think its been 2 months since we have been going out, I kinda forgot, like what month are we in now ,.......like September.

[Heaven's Cloud]

[color=indigo]I hate mind games...your first mistake was pouring your heart out to her, that is never a good move, at least until you have been seriously dating for a long time. Another thing I do want to point out was Erik is probably a friend that a)she doesn't talk to online b)a good friend or c)a made up person...she knew that you would try to contact her via IM, so she probably tried to make you jealous.

Now, for the true problem...you have put the ball in her court, a guy never wants the ball in "her court". Now it is up to her to decide what she will do. This is how I would handle the situation. Call her on the phone (if you can meet her in person that is even better) and say "I think you are a really cool girl and I'd love to date you, but,if you don't want that kind of relationship, I'd still like to hangout some time and be friends because I really enjoy your company and you are insanly fun to be around..."
This line puts the ball back into "your" court because there is very little chance the girl will say "no way! I don't want to be your friend!". This move also forces the girl to hang out with you at least one more time...the rest is up to you...[/color]

[GhostofSalvtore]

well I exaggerated the "pouring out my heart" I mean I just really left a message and asked what was going on if she had found another or what she was doing. If she was calling it quits on me or what her case was.

[RicoTranzrig]

It's you're choice if you want to try to make it work. You can't really tell if she likes you from this point. I think a good thing to do is to keep talking to her...especially in person. But don't chase her around and get a sudden heart rush just by being close to her, that might mean that you've fallen for her and that isn't good.

IMO, if she's giving you problems or causing you pain, she isn't worth it...

[GhostofSalvtore]

well in person is really hard she lives about 45 mins away and its just really hard to see each other but I can see her every weekend if I wanted to, but she is grounded right now, or so she tells me.
yeah I know but if it does work out I will be just really :D and if it doesn I will be like:confused: :bawl: :(

[Guest Hikaru Ichijyo]

*Sigh* Well take it from me GhostofSalvtore chances are you need to move on. If the girl is avoiding you, you must of gave her some reason to do so or what ever interest was there isn't there now. I'm not going to run you with the sob story of how it is better to have loved and lost, to have never loved at all. Or there is plenty of fish in the sea because well even though that may be true it still hurts to be ignored or abruptly dumped especially if you had feelings for the person which I can tell you do.

My advice to you is there are two things you can do. One, you can be honest pour your heart out and stuff which you already did which frankly sometimes makes things worse. Or 2 which is the better choice, wait it out for another week if things don't change move on. Save yourself the pain of dewling over a loss for too long, its not healthy for the spirit or body.

If you think I'm giving you bad advice trust me, I recently went through not exactly the same but a similar situation. Though at some point you have to wisen up. ^_~ Sadly this was posted using quick reply but my response wasn't very quick. Anyway I'm sure you'll make the right move.

Sincerely,
Kevin

[Semjaza]

Simply sounds like she isn't ready for any relationship. I'm not so sure you are either, considering you seem so attached to something that apparently wasn't working (no offense to you at all).

I think you are best moving on and seeing what happens next. I wouldn't obsess over something that didn't last long and doesn't seem like it was meant to be. There are lots of other girls out there.

[Kent]

Ghost of salvatore,
I am sorry to hear about your situation, but, I would much appreciate it if you would clean up your post. Seperate paragraphs and what not.

I wouldnt usually say this stuff, but lately I was threatend with being banned simply for doing just what I have called you out on.

I really am sorry about the girl and I would heed the advice of the other board members. They all seem to have valid opinions and each have given you good ways to deal with the situation.

I just ask that you watch your "post quality".
Although I find it odd no one has given you crap the way I got it.(of course that could be because it may not have been about the grammar for me) but for you its simply grammar. watch out, there seem to be a few english teachers with a thing for bad post.

good luck with both your situations.

[Avalon]

Man, I understand what you're going through! I was having a similar problem like yours. It seems that your girlfriend was like my ex in a way. Maybe she doesn't want commitment like he did. Maybe she just wants to see other people because she probably felt trapped in her relationship with you. My opinion, give her time. If she doesn't come to her senses, she doesn't need you. You should know that you can do better than her. Never forget that!

[Vegitto4]

Wow, thats kinda heavy. Now, it's happening with the one i'm in, except the break thing. it's rather interesting. I was threated with getting dumped over her ex's necklace that i stole back for him. I'll go into details later

[Jesus Chicken]

Hehehe, Hey man, I know exactly how you feel. I'm in a situation, that's quite simliar, but a bit stranger. Very long story anway. Yeah, I say you just go along with it. To be in a relationship is to get screwed around, especially at our age. Don't worry about it, be please that you actually got the girl in the first place...