Guest Soft mush Posted August 31, 2001 Share Posted August 31, 2001 I have been sitting in my chamber of solitude again, and my brain was filled with many questions of the universe. I have worked out many of these enigma's but I decided to bring my case to the public ie: you. 1. if you throw a cat out of the window, does it become kitty litter? 2.If you choke a smurf, what color does it turn? 3.If you take an Asian & spin him around, does he become disoriented? 4. Is it ok to use an AM radio in the afternoon? 5.What do chickens think we taste like? 6.What do u call a male ladybug? 7.What hair color is on the license of a bald man? 8. When dog food is new tasting, who taste tests it? 9.Why didn't Noah swat those two misquitos? 10.Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections? 11.Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle? 12.Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them? 13.Why are there interstates in Hawaii? 14.Have you ever imagined a world w/ out hypothetical situations? 15.If you squeeze olives to get olive oil, then where does baby oil come from? 16.If a cow laughs, does milk come out her nose? 17.What would Geronimo yell if he jumped out of an airplane?MEEEEE!!!??? 18.If con and pro are opposite, then is Congress and progress opposite? 19.If flying is safe, why is the airport called the terminal? 20.If American mothers giver their babies tiny forks and spoons, then what do Chinese mothers give their babies? toothpicks? HMMMMMMMMMMMMM?????????????? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Digivise Posted August 31, 2001 Share Posted August 31, 2001 That is alot of question. Does your name refer to your brain? :laugh: *Smiles* :) :D :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frankie5 Angels Posted August 31, 2001 Share Posted August 31, 2001 [QUOTE]Why didn't Noah swat those two misquitos? [/QUOTE] He would of only swatted one of the mosquitos,because the male mosquito eats grass roots.Other than that those are pretty funny. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
conpiracymonki Posted August 31, 2001 Share Posted August 31, 2001 [b]Hey...mind wha you say about Asians! :mad: Other than, I like....:rolleyes: meh, go figure[/b] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Soft mush Posted August 31, 2001 Share Posted August 31, 2001 1. Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift? 2. Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks? 3. How do a fool and his money GET together? 4. How do you know when it's time to tune your bagpipes? 5. How is it that a building burns up as it burns down? 6. If the pen is mightier than the sword, and a picture is worth a thousand words, how dangerous is a fax? 7. If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent? 8. If you throw a cat out the car window, does it become kitty litter? 9. What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men? 10. What was the best thing before sliced bread? 11. Why do banks charge you a "non-sufficient funds" fee on money they already know you don't have? 12. Why do they put Braille on the drive-through bank machines? 13. Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections? 14. If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends? 15. If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too? 16. In a country of free speech, why are there phone bills? 17. How come there aren't B batteries? 18. How do "Do not walk on the grass" signs get there? 19. How do I set my laser printer on stun? 20. How is it possible to have a civil war? 21. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting? 22. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? 23. If the #2 pencil is so popular, why is it still #2? 24. If you ate pasta and antipasta, would you still be hungry? 25. Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song? 26. If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet? 27. Crime doesn't pay...does that mean that my job is a crime? 28. Did Noah keep his bees in archives? 29. How can there be self-help "groups"? 30. How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign? 31. How do you know honesty is the best policy until you have tried some of the others? 32. How do you throw away a garbage can? 33. How does a Thermos know if the drink should be hot or cold? 34. How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings? 35. If a word in the dictionary is misspelled, how would we know? 36. If Superman is so smart, then why does he wear his underpants on the outside of his trousers? 37. If you're in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights? 38. What happens to an 18-hour bra after 18 hours? 39. Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes? 40. Why do tourists go to the tops of tall buildings and then put money into telescopes so they can see things on the ground close-up? 41. Why do we kill people for killing people to show that killing people is wrong? 42. Why is it that bullets ricochet off of Superman's chest, but he ducks when the gun is thrown at him? 43. Why is it that night falls but day breaks? 44. What if the Hokey Pokey IS what it's all about? 45. When your pet bird sees you reading the newspaper, does he wonder why you're just sitting there, staring at carpeting? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ruki Makino Posted August 31, 2001 Share Posted August 31, 2001 Somebody has a lot of time on their hands Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PiroMunkie Posted August 31, 2001 Share Posted August 31, 2001 [SIZE=1][QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Soft mush [/i] [B]1. if you throw a cat out of the window, does it become kitty litter? [COLOR=green]Cat's should burn and die, so I dont care[/COLOR] 2.If you choke a smurf, what color does it turn? [COLOR=green]dark blue to purple[/COLOR] 3.If you take an Asian & spin him around, does he become disoriented? [COLOR=green]you dont need to be Asian to get disoriented from spinning around too much[/COLOR] 4. Is it ok to use an AM radio in the afternoon? [COLOR=green]I wouldn't know, I don't listen to AM radio[/COLOR] 5.What do chickens think we taste like? [COLOR=green]Chicken[/COLOR] 6.What do u call a male ladybug? [COLOR=green]Transvestive[/COLOR] 7.What hair color is on the license of a bald man? [COLOR=green]none[/COLOR] 8. When dog food is new tasting, who taste tests it? [COLOR=green]a dog, duh[/COLOR] 9.Why didn't Noah swat those two misquitos? [COLOR=green]I dont believe in that religion so I dont care[/COLOR] 10.Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections? [COLOR=green]so disease wont spread throught the body and infect other people while they take it to the morgue[/COLOR] 11.Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle? [COLOR=green]not enough interaction with air[/COLOR] 12.Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them? [COLOR=green]That's murder of another human (you can get arrested for that just to let you know), and cannibalism if you take em home gut em and eat em 13.Why are there interstates in Hawaii? [COLOR=green]To get people places faster[/COLOR] 14.Have you ever imagined a world w/ out hypothetical situations? [COLOR=green]Why should I?[/COLOR] 15.If you squeeze olives to get olive oil, then where does baby oil come from? [COLOR=green]I could answer this but I'm not gonna[/COLOR] 16.If a cow laughs, does milk come out her nose? [COLOR=green]no[/COLOR] 17.What would Geronimo yell if he jumped out of an airplane?MEEEEE!!!??? [COLOR=green]AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!! *splat*[/COLOR] 18.If con and pro are opposite, then is Congress and progress opposite? [COLOR=green]You said that one wrong..[/COLOR] 19.If flying is safe, why is the airport called the terminal?[COLOR=green]How should I know[/COLOR] 20.If American mothers giver their babies tiny forks and spoons, then what do Chinese mothers give their babies? toothpicks? [COLOR=green]sure why not?[/COLOR] HMMMMMMMMMMMMM?????????????? [/B][/QUOTE][/SIZE] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest firemac Posted August 31, 2001 Share Posted August 31, 2001 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Soft mush [/i] [B]I have been sitting in my chamber of solitude again, and my brain was filled with many questions of the universe. I have worked out many of these enigma's but I decided to bring my case to the public ie: you. 1. if you throw a cat out of the window, does it become kitty litter? 2.If you choke a smurf, what color does it turn? 3.If you take an Asian & spin him around, does he become disoriented? 4. Is it ok to use an AM radio in the afternoon? 5.What do chickens think we taste like? 6.What do u call a male ladybug? 7.What hair color is on the license of a bald man? 8. When dog food is new tasting, who taste tests it? 9.Why didn't Noah swat those two misquitos? 10.Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections? 11.Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle? 12.Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them? 13.Why are there interstates in Hawaii? 14.Have you ever imagined a world w/ out hypothetical situations? 15.If you squeeze olives to get olive oil, then where does baby oil come from? 16.If a cow laughs, does milk come out her nose? 17.What would Geronimo yell if he jumped out of an airplane?MEEEEE!!!??? 18.If con and pro are opposite, then is Congress and progress opposite? 19.If flying is safe, why is the airport called the terminal? 20.If American mothers giver their babies tiny forks and spoons, then what do Chinese mothers give their babies? toothpicks? HMMMMMMMMMMMMM?????????????? [/B][/QUOTE] 1. no 2. Green 3. no 4. depends 5. hey, I was wondering that too 6. a ladybug 7. it would say, no hair or bald, I have to check 8. dogs 9. because, he was just fulling god's wishes 10. because they are so used to it or they want to keep it clean for the next victim 11. it's specially designed for that 12. because tourists start to come more at the moment, it's not a hunting season 13. It's just that way 14. dunno 15. they make it in a factory from any materials it's different from olives 16. no 17. he would say, MOMMY! or HOLY ****!!! 18. maybe 19. dunno and flying isn't safe, have you seen the news! 20. no, they probably feed their babies themselves and not all use chopsticks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ice Dragon v2 Posted August 31, 2001 Share Posted August 31, 2001 AAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!! sooooo many questions!!!!!!!!!!! my head is spinning :wigout: :wigout: :wigout: :wigout: :wigout: :wigout: *faints* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Deranged Gerbil Posted August 31, 2001 Share Posted August 31, 2001 chickens probably think we taste like chicken! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*GaLxY-GiRl* Posted August 31, 2001 Share Posted August 31, 2001 1. if you throw a cat out of the window, does it become kitty litter? [color=coral]....Nope, it becomes road-kill... [/color] 2.If you choke a smurf, what color does it turn? [color=coral]...Purple....[/color] 3.If you take an Asian & spin him around, does he become disoriented? [color=coral]...Dizzy....[/color] 4. Is it ok to use an AM radio in the afternoon? [color=coral]...Yep...[/color] 5.What do chickens think we taste like? [color=coral]....Metal...[/color] 6.What do u call a male ladybug? [color=coral]....Man-bug...[/color] 7.What hair color is on the license of a bald man? [color=coral]...."lack there of"....[/color] 8. When dog food is new tasting, who taste tests it? [color=coral]....Old men.....[/color] 9.Why didn't Noah swat those two misquitos? [color=coral]....Because that would have definatly been defying his job description....[/color] 10.Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections? [color=coral]....Good question :confused:....[/color] 11.Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle? [color=coral]...it does.....[/color] 12.Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them? [color=coral]....the government has a way with making laws against all the fun sh!t....:mad:....[/color] 13.Why are there interstates in Hawaii? [color=coral]...Uh...[/color] 14.Have you ever imagined a world w/ out hypothetical situations? [color=coral].....Plato....you suck!.....[/color] 15.If you squeeze olives to get olive oil, then where does baby oil come from? [color=coral]....Yer momma...j/k[/color] 16.If a cow laughs, does milk come out her nose? [color=coral].....It would have to drink some first.....then you'd have to teach it to laugh....:eek:[/color] 17.What would Geronimo yell if he jumped out of an airplane?MEEEEE!!!??? [color=coral]:laugh:...He would yell..."Oh Cr@p!!"...[/color] 18.If con and pro are opposite, then is Congress and progress opposite? [color=coral]......You know what![/color] 19.If flying is safe, why is the airport called the terminal? [color=coral].....ask Aaliyah.[/color] 20.If American mothers giver their babies tiny forks and spoons, then what do Chinese mothers give their babies? toothpicks? [color=coral]....Now this is just a dumb question...[/color] HMMMMMMMMMMMMM?????????????? [color=coral][i]The answers to these qeustions do not directly reflect the opinions of the author....just her boredom.[/i][/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest firemac Posted August 31, 2001 Share Posted August 31, 2001 1. Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift? depends 2. Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks? dunno, have to go check 3. How do a fool and his money GET together? dunno 4. How do you know when it's time to tune your bagpipes? dunno 5. How is it that a building burns up as it burns down? it burns up because it's starting to burn, and it burns down because the building is going to be no more if it burns all the way 6. If the pen is mightier than the sword, and a picture is worth a thousand words, how dangerous is a fax? very dangerous 7. If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent? they wouldn't have to, because the mime woudl ahve nothing to say,same thing to a mute person. 8. If you throw a cat out the car window, does it become kitty litter? look at number 1. in my other post 9. What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men? look at my answer in my other post 10. What was the best thing before sliced bread? baked bread 11. Why do banks charge you a "non-sufficient funds" fee on money they already know you don't have? dunno 12. Why do they put Braille on the drive-through bank machines? what is Braille? 13. Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections? you asked this already 14. If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends? to make her more popular 15. If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too? no 16. In a country of free speech, why are there phone bills? because it's a cheap country as well and it's sad place 17. How come there aren't B batteries? they haven't deciced to make them yet 18. How do "Do not walk on the grass" signs get there? they have to specially get there with some sort of crank, or they put the sign there, and then make the grass nice 19. How do I set my laser printer on stun? dunno 20. How is it possible to have a civil war? when one part of the country fights the other 21. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting? in space 22. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? because women where it, I don't think that has nothing to do with love 23. If the #2 pencil is so popular, why is it still #2? it's the type of mark it makes 24. If you ate pasta and antipasta, would you still be hungry? no 25. Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song? no, the song was made after the order 26. If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet? no 27. Crime doesn't pay...does that mean that my job is a crime? no 28. Did Noah keep his bees in archives? dunno 29. How can there be self-help "groups"? more than one person helps themself 30. How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign? they don't it's just more common for deers to cross there 31. How do you know honesty is the best policy until you have tried some of the others? you have to try everything I guess 32. How do you throw away a garbage can? you don't 33. How does a Thermos know if the drink should be hot or cold? it's specially designed 34. How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings? what you mean 35. If a word in the dictionary is misspelled, how would we know? we won't know, unless you ahve another dictionary and you are smart enough, but a dictionary doesn't have any misspelled words 36. If Superman is so smart, then why does he wear his underpants on the outside of his trousers? his parents made him that suitm what you expect 37. If you're in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights? you would see it turning off at your speed 38. What happens to an 18-hour bra after 18 hours? never knew there such a thing 39. Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes? you asked this already 40. Why do tourists go to the tops of tall buildings and then put money into telescopes so they can see things on the ground close-up? it's fun, and cool 41. Why do we kill people for killing people to show that killing people is wrong? I don't think anyone does that to show that 42. Why is it that bullets ricochet off of Superman's chest, but he ducks when the gun is thrown at him? reaction 43. Why is it that night falls but day breaks? it's just a saying 44. What if the Hokey Pokey IS what it's all about? we dunno 45. When your pet bird sees you reading the newspaper, does he wonder why you're just sitting there, staring at carpeting? we dunno, birds aren't that smart to think that Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ice Dragon v2 Posted August 31, 2001 Share Posted August 31, 2001 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Soft mush [/i] [B] 3.If you take an Asian & spin him around, does he become disoriented? [/B][/QUOTE] HEY!!!!!!!! i resent that Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest firemac Posted August 31, 2001 Share Posted August 31, 2001 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Ice Dragon v2 [/i] [B] HEY!!!!!!!! i resent that [/B][/QUOTE] oh cool you are an asian, asians are cool,on a side note: I'm very fond of asian women, anyways asains(overall) are cool Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ice Dragon v2 Posted August 31, 2001 Share Posted August 31, 2001 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by firemac [/i] [B] oh cool you are an asian, asians are cool,on a side note: I'm very fond of asian women, anyways asains(overall) are cool [/B][/QUOTE] dam straight im an asian im one hot-headed, anime lovin pinoy(filipino, if u ppl dont know)!!!!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
conpiracymonki Posted August 31, 2001 Share Posted August 31, 2001 [b]Um...I'm asian too :D Are we s'posedta actually answer these questions or laugh our aszes off at them? [/b]:confused: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ice Dragon v2 Posted August 31, 2001 Share Posted August 31, 2001 i say laugh at them answering them is gonna be hard on your brain Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Navi Posted September 1, 2001 Share Posted September 1, 2001 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Soft mush [/i] [B] 1. if you throw a cat out of the window, does it become kitty litter? literally maybe, technically no 2.If you choke a smurf, what color does it turn? purple, or red 3.If you take an Asian & spin him around, does he become disoriented? not even funny 4. Is it ok to use an AM radio in the afternoon? yeah 5.What do chickens think we taste like? they aren't profiteering gluttons like us....besides i dont think theyre smart enough. 6.What do u call a male ladybug? a ladybug 7.What hair color is on the license of a bald man? his pervious hair color i think 8. When dog food is new tasting, who taste tests it? a taste tester 9.Why didn't Noah swat those two misquitos? because he wanted to spread malaria 10.Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections? because someone might drop it/poke someone and theyd be screwed. 11.Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle? because its plastic...i dunno 12.Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them? its a saying 13.Why are there interstates in Hawaii? what else would we call them? 14.Have you ever imagined a world w/ out hypothetical situations? no 15.If you squeeze olives to get olive oil, then where does baby oil come from? there are a lot of ingeredients....nice try though 16.If a cow laughs, does milk come out her nose? cows laugh? id like to see that. 17.What would Geronimo yell if he jumped out of an airplane?MEEEEE!!!??? mmmm....no. he'd say "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" 18.If con and pro are opposite, then is Congress and progress opposite? yeah, ha ha. 19.If flying is safe, why is the airport called the terminal? they get rid of planes/tourists... 20.If American mothers giver their babies tiny forks and spoons, then what do Chinese mothers give their babies? maybe chopsticks....but then again the baby might poke their own fcking eye out..... [/B][/QUOTE] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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